My name is steve but that is irrelevant. I have a whole range of health problems that lead me to be homebound and very isolated. The reason for this blog is to illustrate and educate.. let me explain....... I am very happily married, thankfully.so. without my better half I simply would be here now. The root cause of my downfall is Type II Diabetes. This was diagnosed at 31 and caused by bad eating and drinking habits plus a complete lack of exercise. I have no one else to blame but myself. This caused kidney failure, severe nerve damage and retinopathy (dodgy eyesight).. the end result is dialysis three times a week plus severely limited mobility using crutches or a wheelchair. I am also partially sighted and now officially disabled. More about all this later.. People As Jim Morrison once said people are strange. In life you meet a range of human beings. The circles you mix in tend to determine the range of odd characters you meet. . In my earlier years, say 22 - 30 I was not a people person outside of work. At work I put on a front. These days it can be the same but I have learnt to be natural and it is down to others to deal with me. On the whole I have been pleased by the way most people approach me. It can really pies you off if someone lets a door close on you when in a wheelchair. A good way to receive an affectionate f##k off you tw#t from me. 29 July Been a strange few days .. badly fluid overloaded and now back down to a sylph like 105kg. Feeling better and more human. Starting to write blog/diary has been helping a lot. Big thanks to Emelie Salford for her on going support and artistic encouragement. Who would have thought that I would have tried sculpture at 53 when I am partially sighted and only have use of one and a half hands. Technology Strange that after working in IT for many years I now suffer huge frustrations at its limitations. Mind you I now rely on it more than I really like to. My physical limitations mean I have to make use of whatever tools I can to get by. Frustrations still run pretty high. As mentioned earlier Emelie has prodded and poked me successfully to get me to see how art can be used as part of a rehabilitation plan for me. Even after a couple of months I love every chat we have. Believe Me I never thought I would take up miniature sculpting. How do you cope ? Having a terminal illness and a disability or two poses challenges every day. The loss of control over areas of your life can get you down. Today I had dialysis. In order to attend I need to be transported to the renal unit. As I live in a first floor flat and can only walk short distances on crutches I need help. This means a two man crew, an ambulance and piece of kit called a switchover. Using these resources it takes 50 minutes to get me to the renal unit. This whole situation is out of my control. I have to attend or I will die. I have no other means of getting to the unit. Sometimes this really passes me off. Early August It has been a dreadful few days that have tested my coping mechanisms fully. I am not saying that I successfully coped because I didnt. I even blanked dialysis today (Mon) as I was in a foul mood and just wasnt interested .in going. Juliet was not impressed but she picks her battles well. I am really not rational well the depressions takes control and I am pretty unpleasant too abbot. I have learnt that I can miss a dialysis session without suffering dire consequences so I dont stress about it. I just take an extra anti depressant. So what happens when you miss a dialysis session ? Well the nurses get annoyed but dont worry just be honest and confident. The physical effect will vary. Everyone will be beaver as you will be carrying additional fluid for the extra days between sessions. You will feel heavier because you are. 1 litre of fluid weighs 1 kilo so do the maths. I recommend that we all keep a daily fluid record so you know how much you are drinking and are better placed to control it. It will mean that at the next session they will have to remove more fluid. After all your good work you will still have periods when you feel like hell or worse. I cant lie and say all is well all the time. Dialysis in combination with good diet and fluid control will do a good job. However, for those lucky souls like me with other problems life can be very complicated and at times difficult. I know that have to derail with sever clinical depression together with range number of problems caused by diabetes. I can no longer walk without special boots and crutches,. I am partially sighted and have a withered left hand that is not much use to me. These together lead to a dreadful sense of real isolation.
Posted on: Thu, 14 Aug 2014 14:39:15 +0000
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