OF A RESOLUTION A year ago at this time I was doing my best to mentally prepare myself for the “Whipple Procedure,” which I had on January 16th, 2014. A year has gone by, and unfortunately I still find myself in recovery mode, as doctors are even baffled as to why I have yet to fully heal. Tomorrow, at 8am, I will be having a EUS, a procedure that entails a scope being inserted in my mouth, then down through my digestive tract, with the ultimate goal of getting a closer look at my pancreas, and hopefully finding out what the problem is. When I made this appointment I was informed that due to the surgeries I’ve had, and the rearrangement of my “insides,” that it might not be possible to reach my pancreas via the scope, and if that’s the case, I will have to undergo a surgery to get the result needed. With all that being said, I would like to take a minute to address how I have been dealing with my recovery over the past year, which in a word, has been terrible. I have been sleeping my days away, for that’s my only escape from the pain, I throw pity party, after pity party, while convincing myself how horrible my life is, and ultimately pushing away everyone who has ever cared about me in the process. I do all of this because I don’t know how, nor do I want to deal with my new “normal.” I know that my life could be way worse, trust me I do, I just can’t seem to focus on anything but the negatives. I’m embarrassed and ashamed, at what I have become. Lastly, I would like to share my New Year’s Resolution: I resolve to focus on the positive aspects of my life, and make the best out of whatever situation I find myself in; I will appreciate what I have, and be the person, and friend that I know I can be. Here’s to staying true to our resolutions!!! I wish all of you all nothing but the best in this upcoming year….Happy New Year!!!!!
Posted on: Fri, 02 Jan 2015 01:24:39 +0000
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