OHMY!LYMPICS NEWS UPDATE! Part 1 of the News Desks Team Classy Sassy Lassies Expose is delayed so we may bring you breaking news ... But first ... YAY!MAICANADIFFERENCE BOBSLEIGH TEAMS: *Team School Runnings (SOHO, MILY MOOC, AMY WOOD, DR T) *Team Victorious Secret (HOLLY AZEVEDO, LAUREN MONTE, KIM MOORE, ELLEN GOODMAN) *Team Classy Sassy Lassies (KINDERGARTENROCKS, ELLIE HENRY, LAURA BARTOLOMEO, ANNIE LIGHT) *Team 37 (37 PEOPLE, KYLE BIEDA, HARSHMAN BANDS) *Team CASYS ANGELS (CAROL COBB, AMY RODRIGUEZ, STEVEN INMAN, YVONNE COSME-MARTINEZ) *Team ReadSkating (WENDY JOSEPH, ALICIA BUSHEY, BRIGETTE ANDERSON, CASSANDRA MCDOWELL) Remember that even if you dont want to form a bobsleigh team yourself, you can still participate in the Games! You can compete in the individual events, and you can use those same donations to participate in the bobsleigh race by assisting any of the registered teams. Simply include a team name in your donation message, and youll help push that teams bobsleigh a bit farther. You can help any and all bobsleighs that you want, while also competing for your own individual medals. See Sundays Short Track Race post here to read about all the events and prizes. DISORDERLY BOOK DISRUPTS OHMY!LYMPICS: In light of last nights audacious tactic by The 11th Edition of Roberts Rules of Order, which not only sauntered into the Alpo Skiing event as though it belonged there, but also scandalously donated to classroom projects, the Ohmy!lympics Secretariat has just held a news conference during which it issued the following statement: Whereas, we appreciate the generosity that The 11th Edition of Roberts Rules of Order has shown to classrooms; and Whereas we are nonetheless shocked that any edition of this particular book would so blatantly flout the exceedingly clear rules for the Alpo Skiing event, which is restricted to non-human life forms; and Whereas perhaps such audacity can be explained by The 11th Editions youth, in contrast to the elder The 4th Edition, which has taken a much more thoughtful, measured approach to this situation; and Whereas the pages of the 11th Edition of Roberts Rules of Order may derive from trees and the printing may possibly involve vegetable-based inks; and Whereas the digital version does not; and Whereas author Brigadier General Henry Martyn Robert was a brigadier general, which is quite interesting; and Whereas Brigadier General Henry Martyn Robert was (from May 2, 1837, to May 11, 1923) an extant human life form; and Whereas Brigadier General Henry Martyn Robert was not (from May 2, 1837, to May 11, 1923) either a tree or a vegetable; and Whereas, we are impressed by The 11th Edition of Roberts Rules of Orders fighting spirit; and Whereas, we are certain that Brigadier General Henry Martyn Robert would also be impressed; Resolved, the Committee on Deciding Things will get back to you. During the emergency press conference, an unexpected and surprisingly loud voice in support of The Editions of Roberts Rules of Order spoke up from the back of the room. Wearing a stylish, pointy hat that still had traces of snow on it, a most learned ELF who appears to be a close acquaintance of one or both of the books (probably through a chance meeting on a shelf), raised a hand at the end of a preternaturally long, thin arm and with great civility inquired, In reference to Roberts Rules of Order, I return from the North Pole to ponder: Point of Privilege: Pertains to noise, personal comfort, etc.--may interrupt only if necessary! Does this personal comfort refer to the US Olympic Sweaters or the Sassiness of the Lassies? It was necessary for me to interrupt and represent Team Victorious Secret. The News Desks swift analysis of this statement quickly raised an important question: What was ELFs true motivation for such a dramatic journey from the North Pole to an Ohmy!lympic Secretariat press conference? In the News Desks considered opinion, it could only be sELF-interest! ELF is apparently attempting to compete as an Alpo-Skier and wants to guarantee that elves will qualify for this prestigious event. In response to the News Desks follow-up suspicion, the spokesperson for the Secretariat made clear that elves are considered non-human life forms (even if they only live in childrens imaginations, which always counts) and do indeed qualify for the Alpo-Skiing event. However, the spokesperson went on to explain, Unfortunately, ELF is not a real elf, but a toy. Members of the public can witness photographic evidence of this fact at Leaking Walls ..., Integrating The Arts ... and several other projects. Yes, ELF is a toy that can chat about Roberts Rules of Order, which is pretty impressive, but, nonetheless ... ELF is disqualified. The Secretariat spokesperson then expanded these remarks to include another of last nights unusual participants in the Alpo Skiing event. According to the spokesperson, FLEECE in Tennessee may look like a soft, adorable lamb from the Volunteer State -- and certainly many have been fleeced by that pink nose and floppy ears and willingness to help out. However, in an unguarded moment, FLEECE was overhead to say, Im one of a whole fleet of beanie babies who have long referred to ourselves as The Olympians! Were carrying the torch for Team School Runnings! Furthermore (and this really hurt our feelings), photographic evidence of FLEECE in Tennessee holding a protest sign directed at the Secretariat is available on several projects, most notably Reading Our Way to Better Behaviors, an activity which we can only hope is now on FLEECEs to-do list. FLEECE, by the way, is disqualified. The News Desk can exclusively report that, directly after the press conference, the spokesperson and several key members of the Secretariat were seen heading toward the Overcoming Anger project. Will even more Editions of Roberts Rules of Order emerge from shelves to fan the flames of controversy (without getting too close to the flames, of course)? Could Tennessees mysterious DR. T (much like Prof. Moriarty) and the crime syndicate Team School Runnings to which she belongs be the hidden forces behind so much of the turmoil now throwing the Ohmy!lympics into total disarray! And was CAROL COBB of Team Casys Angels performing one of her most remarkable ventriloquism tricks (which have previously astonished sell-out crowds at theatres from Paris to Shanghai) in order to cast Free Bird shower-singing suspicions on Team SkateReading? Stay tuned! :) donorschoose.org/donors/viewChallenge.html?id=29313
Posted on: Tue, 11 Feb 2014 02:36:16 +0000
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