Oh yeahhhh, are you looking for a gift for someone who has everything? Bet Uncle Leon doesn’t have this! That’s right, it’s a penis toaster!! Nahhh, not like it toasts penises. That would be more of a cylindrical shape. Nope, this toasts bread in the pattern of a penis. Click on it to see ‘cause it’s really funny. Anyways, I couldn’t help but think of a few things when I saw this item: 1. Who the hell thought of this thing? INVENTOR: Oh, I know what people like to eat, crusty penises! WTF? 2. Holy crap, I see Jesus in my toast!! No wait, it’s just a nutsack. 3. Hold on, if I’m married isn’t this kinda like eating another man’s penis? ‘Cause that’s just wrong. 4. So I guess if you want a black penis, you just get pumpernickel bread. 5. Do you think lesbians will eat this toast or does that just gross them out? 6. Awww shit, how do I spread creamed cheese on without covering up the beautiful design? Then again, maybe I strategically enhance the picture with creamed cheese. 7. Do you think the inventor went on Shark Tank to fund it? INVENTOR: We’ve created a special piece of toast for each of you. Sorry Lori, a vajayjay doesn’t toast quite as well as a penis. LORI: That’s okay, I don’t really want to eat myself anyway. MARK CUBAN: Yeah, I’m not going to eat a penis. I’m out. 8. Awww shit, I wish I knew you were serving penis this morning. I totally ate it last night. 9. WIFE: Do you want your toast cut in half, honey? HUBBY: Sure, go ahead and circumcise it. 10. Mmmmmm, this has a delicious nutty flavor. Click on the link and check out the HILARIOUS reviews and see all the other awesome designs they have. They are a RIOT!!
Posted on: Thu, 09 Oct 2014 01:17:09 +0000
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