Pause and let them “think!” We tend to prompt and direct the child through daily activities, giving them little time to ponder, contemplate, appraise, and evaluate. These are all part of dynamic thinking that they need to practice. We live such a fast paced life that we do not want to slow down to “smell the roses”. We have to remember that the above components of dynamic thinking, which come naturally for us, have to be taught and practiced for children on the spectrum. This does not require “therapy sessions” to teach, but can be included in all the daily activities that you do together. Every daily activity can be a learning opportunity to “think”. You simply have to (1) do them together and (2) slow down and let them “think” their way through it. We tend to do it for them, or stand behind them and quickly prompt them through it. We don’t want them to make a mistake or get anxious, so we give them the right answer, or simply do it for them. However, they have to feel the challenge to elicit “thinking” in order to master the challenge. It is this “feeling the challenge”, think it through, then mastering it that builds confidence in thinking. Every routine daily activity can be a learning opportunity. These can be taking a bath, baking cookies together, washing the car, playing basketball in the driveway, reading a book together, any daily activity. The important factors are: 1. Do the activities together, side by side, sharing the experience. 2. Both you and your child have a role to play, each playing their part. 3. Try to set up their part to be easy, but require some challenge to stimulate thinking on their part. 4. Add choices and options for him to evaluate, simple snags and barriers to “think” through, simple mistakes to problem solve, and a little uncertainty to contemplate. “Oh, I wonder what we do next”, “Opps, I did that wrong, I wonder how we can fix that”, “Oh, we could do it this way, or that way! I wonder which way is better?” All these little things are typically present in daily activities; however, we solve them for the child, giving them little opportunities to think their way through. 5. Don’t be so quick to prompt and direct! We tend to quickly jump in and tell the child the right way, before they have a chance to “think” about it. As you two are doing something together, try to delay prompting, pause and hold off long enough to allow the child to “think” it through. Otherwise, they get use to “not thinking”, knowing you will jump in and solve it for them. a. Instead of telling him “how to do it”, say something like “I wonder how we can do that!”, then scratch your head like you are contemplating. Pause and give the child time to appraise what is needed and make a response. b. If the child doesn’t respond, then give him two options to appraise. “I guess we could try _________ or maybe __________”. Again pause and give the child a chance to “think” and respond. c. If the child still does not respond, verbally appraise each option “I guess if we tried this way, ______ might happen. However, if we do it that way, then _______ might happen”. Again pause, and let him “think” and respond. 6. Start by using examples that are so obvious, that require little thinking at first. For example when baking something together, in order to move liquid (milk, water, oil, etc.) from one container to another, contemplate whether it would be easier to use a spoon or a fork (obviously the spoon), then try each one. Obviously, using a fork will not work because the liquid simply pours through the fork, making it impossible to transfer the liquid. Don’t tell him, try each one out, and say “I wonder which one works better.” Pause and wait for a response. If no response, say “Which one do you think?” If still no response, than verbally appraise what is needed (transferring the liquid to another container), and then verbally evaluate the pros and cons of each option. 7. Get used to slightly stretching the demands of the child’s role to make him think a little more. Make the task a little bit harder to make them stop and think about how to adjust what they are doing to make it work. Slowly add new learning, giving a little more responsibility, requiring them to adjust their performance. Let them feel the challenge, think it though, then feel the mastery! Pause and let them try it on their own, before guiding them through it. If no response, only give them part of the solution, enough to get them started, but still enough uncertainty to make them think. 8. Add variations or elaborations to typical daily tasks. Walk to school a different way, pausing at each turn to contemplate the best way to go. Bounce the ball to each other, instead of throwing the ball. Take the elevator, instead of the escalator. Have the family pass the food around the table to fill their plates (family style serving), instead of filling the plate before bringing it to the table. Take normal daily activities and do them a different way, or add a little variation to them. Again, pause, contemplate out loud (“I wonder ____”), and give the child a chance to respond! 9. Throughout the day, find activities that do not have just one right way of doing it (like vacuuming or sweeping the floor), and pause to contemplate which option to choose. If you have time, do an experiment and try out each option, while evaluating the pros and cons of each. 10. Always look for little problems, or snags, you can create to provide your child a chance to problem solve. You may need to highlight the problem, to make it stand out, “Opps…looks like this is not working. I wonder what we can do now!” But pause and give your child a chance to respond. If no response, give a clue and pause again. 11. When “thinking through” things together, make sure you celebrate the process. Give each other high fives and thumbs up, with a declarative statement like “We did it!”, “We are good together!”, “We ROCK! “Wow, we thought that one through!” Spotlight the “thinking” and how successful you were together! These are just some examples how you can build contemplating, appraising, evaluating, and “thinking” into their daily routine. As the child gets better, add complexity to the “thinking.” Gradually build stronger and stronger, thinking skills!
Posted on: Fri, 13 Sep 2013 21:02:28 +0000
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