Theres no funny anecdote to this story, friends. No, kapow! My Littles are so damn funny and listen right quick to what they just said or did. No this just happened to me and I peed my pants. This is just a little story bout a crazy lady in south Georgia whos worried bout something, a chick who realized she is love and she is loved. If youre here for the laughs, this one isnt for you. I fell back to sleep this mornin and had an awful dream. One that left me feelin despondent, dejected, and displaced (but it seems not without the ability to use alliteration). I told my mister about the dream as he hurried out the door for his last official day of school (Hes a band director, so hell work through the summer as well.). My mister said I had this dream on accounta how nervous and worried I am about gettin our house. See, weve been in an open contract since we moved here last July. My mister is takin our application to our local bank today. We dont have the best credit. We dont come from people who are homeowners and never aspired to be homeowners ourselves until we moved to Lil Nashvegas. Once you find the town where you wanna put down roots, everything changes, right? Now, were down to the wire, just one month to go before we have to have approval for this home loan. I know this is my dream home and I know we just sank some money into makin updates (and did so before we officially had the house which is absurd, but had to be done) and I know Id cry a bunch and also, let down some folks who helped get us here, folks Id never want to let down in one million, gajillion years if we didnt get the house, but my mister looked right at me this mornin and said something hes said before, but I needed to hear it again or else I wouldnt have had that terrible, no good, very bad dream. He said, The very worst thing that can happen here is that we have to move to to another house. Now, all of the unspoken meanin there is what gives me such peace. Whats implied in that statement is well still be a family. Well still have found the best town we could have ever imagined to raise that family. Well still have made and connected with this amazin group of friends who feel like family. Hes still teachin kids music which is what he loves. Im still writin my words which is what I love. All that right there is a mighty fine implication. Im reminded of how desperately miserable I was six years ago, how those events led me to a dark place where I just wanted to die and was darn near close to makin that happen. Instead, I turned a beautiful corner and arrived at love. That was my choice, you see. To keep goin, to round that corner, to reach for love. Once I strip away the useless things from this situation (the shame and worry), Im left with the truth of my journey. My worst case scenario is I have such abundance no matter what house we call home. Sweetbabycheezeits, Ive come a long way, friends. I am love and I am loved. Thanks, yall, for helpin me get here.
Posted on: Fri, 30 May 2014 12:50:46 +0000
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