This is what I wrote for my dad at his service. Ive debated about posting it, but Ive decided I would like people to know what he was about and why Im making such a fuss about all of this. In memory of my dad: When I think of my dad, I think of a man who loved and cared for his family more than anything. From his mom and dad, to his brother and sister, then on to his own children, grand children, and pets too, his life was about taking care of his family. It didn’t matter when, why, or where, he was always there to offer assistance in any way he could. Without hesitation, he would put himself out to make sure someone or something got taken care of. I never really thought about it until recently, but dad would have been in his mid 20’s when he found himself raising me on his own. He’d already grown up on the family farm, graduated college, married, and proudly served in the military before becoming a single parent. Even then, he knew he could count on family, as his parents, sister, and nephews all worked together to help raise me at such a young age. When dad got a job in this area, his brother, David, allowed us to stay with his family in Waukesha, so dad could plant his feet and get started in his career. From my earliest memories, dad and I did everything together, usually going to the races with friends and family and then doing things like going to Marco’s for pizza. Holidays were always a favorite, as all of our aunts, uncles, and cousins would gather at grandma and grandpa’s house for a few days. After we moved from the area, we still went back home to visit them often, which was always the highlight of my week and I know it was for him too. In the meantime, dad met LuAnn and soon found himself remarried with his new wife and two more children to provide for. The days of hot rodding around in Trans Ams were over and the days of driving around in vans began. While Shaun and Jerry were not his biological children, I could see the love he had for them and how he thought of them as his own. That tradition continued when Shaun and Jerry each married and had children of their own. Dad taught us things by example, like the meaning of work and providing for your family. He taught us the golden rule of treating others the way we would like to be treated. He told us kids we had to be nice to each other, even though we really didn’t want to! He raised us in the church, so we would learn Christian values and then raise our own families the same way. While he may have rolled his eyes on occasion, he never said no when I brought home some junky old car to fix up and drive, knowing full well he’d always be the one to pick me up when the car broke down. He never really yelled at me when I did stupid stuff or got into trouble, even though I knew what he expected of me in terms of behavior. Knowing I disappointed him was usually punishment enough, but he always allowed me to correct my mistakes and make things right. Even though I didn’t like school, he pushed me to pay attention, get good grades, and made me go to college. He taught me about accounting and business and later helped get me started in my own business. Dad loved racing and it’s something we always did together. Even though I wasn’t very good at the beginning and he said I crashed too much, he was always there to support me and provide any opportunity he could. Eventually, my mechanical abilities and technical skills outgrew his ability to help me in that regard, but he still wanted to help and be involved in any way he could. I am so glad he was able to be there for my first feature wins in a go kart and then again in the late model. Dad rarely showed emotion, but I’ve been told from a reliable source there was a lot of cheering and some fist pumping going on during that first late model feature win. I also got great big hugs after both wins. When I was suffering through a divorce and the worst economic meltdown since the great depression, dad was still there to help in any way he could. It didn’t matter if I needed help with a broken heart or a figuring out a broken economy, he was always there. While often challenging, I’m so thankful for the last few years and the last few weeks. While he and I are so much the same, we’re also very much different, and that often made things difficult between us. His kidney failure last year gave us a “time out” and allowed those wounds to heal, so he could just relax and focus on being a dad again. Even up to the very end, he was more concerned about taking care of his family than his own well being. While I have dreaded this day for my entire life, it’s a little bit easier knowing that dad’s health was failing and he’s now at peace. He’s in heaven, reunited with Grandma and Grandpa and Aunt LaVonne, whom he loved dearly. Dad was a quiet, humble man, who seldom spoke about how he felt, but I always knew he loved me and he was very proud of the man I’ve become and the things I’ve done. He has always been my best friend and the first person I would turn to for help. He taught me the meaning of unconditional love and I am truly blessed and honored to be his son. I love you dad, may you rest in peace.
Posted on: Fri, 29 Nov 2013 20:36:14 +0000
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