Trae Brookins was my best friend for almost 25 years. I´m certain many would rightfully say he was their best friend, too. Trae passed away peacefully this afternoon following a long and dignified battle with cancer. He was 41 years old. Trae and I shared a dorm room together for three years at St. Andrews Presbyterian College. Many of our friends from SA have written incredibly touching words about Trae in recent weeks and shared hilarious and heartfelt stories of our misadventures in growing up together in college. I could not be more grateful for this community - for the love they share for Trae, with his incredible wife Rebecca Stacy, and with one another. I was fortunate to have been able to spend a few days with Trae and Rebecca just before Christmas, upon learning that his situation had taken a sudden turn for the worse. Like always, we laughed a lot. Words were often not needed; we just knew (as roommates and friends often do) that there was something (or someone) worth laughing about in the world. After nearly 25 years of friendship, together we had failed to fully mature, and it was wonderful. Even in his pain and suffering, he brought me great joy. Nonetheless, it is a helluva way to end a year and begin another -- pondering life and death, accepting loss. I consider all I encountered this past year and all that is laid out before me in the year ahead, and I wonder what it is that defines me, us. There will be projects to finish, pounds to lose, miles to run, money to raise, causes to promote, meetings to organize, presentations to give, laws to advocate for, books to read, subjects to study, news to catch up on, letters to write, dinners to prepare, parties to host...all of which will shape what lies ahead, but none of which (successful or not) will define who I am, who we are. Right now I feel like RENT, the great Broadway show of my generation, sings best what is on my heart, ¨How do you measure a year in the life? How about love?¨ In the end and through it all, it will be about friends, and husbands and wives and partners and even perfect strangers, all of whom form our communities, our circles...accompanying one another through hurt, celebrating in the joy, laughing at the ridiculous, crying when it feels like the right thing to do, shouting out when it is the only thing to do. For nearly 25 years, Trae, this is what is has been about. In my rather nomadic life, you have been a constant. This is what has defined us...all of us. And it always will. Love. My dear friend and brother, in the deep sadness of your death, you have given me new life. Thank you. May the love you shared with us all live in us and through us and among us now and forever.
Posted on: Mon, 05 Jan 2015 03:45:47 +0000
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