What a BEAUTIFUL DAY to have your lawn mower beat the living crap out of you, and turn you back into a couch potato before noon! After ONE HOUR(my front yard takes 15.5 minutes to mow)of getting my ass handed to me by my 6.5 Hp, self-propelled, bells and whistles, Craftsman lawn mower, I was completely frosted in YARD, had spewed enough obscenities to make MY DAD blush(quite implausible), and nearly took Hannahs bedroom window out with a death-defying rock meets blade event, that I am certain I could turn into a sport AND take the gold, due to my MOW NOW, CASUALTIES LATER motto. So, for the back yard, I ditched my heavy ass, super pig mower, and went with the 4 Hp, Niki-propelled WEEDEATER brand plan b model, with the dog-legged wheels and rust that suggests it might be old enough to have mowed the Ho Chi Minh trail. TEN MINUTES! That little hunk of junk spattered and chugged, smoked and choked, and CHEWED THE SHIT outta three weeks worth of still-wet JUNGLE in ten minutes! I am still shocked! Its so light, it even glided over my stepping stones, and its so small, it hit all the tight spots and went right under all the zero clearance hedges! I dont even need to edge my back yard! Now, Im freshly showered, and off to Home Depot to pretend Im an idiot, and that I DIDNT spend my childhood in Builders Square and Scottys with my avid DIY parents, so I can cute, dumb blonde some sucker into free delivery and installation on a new washing machine. Dont wish me luck. This is WHAT I DO.
Posted on: Sun, 05 Oct 2014 16:53:28 +0000