youtube/watch?v=aw0zzPJOu_0 “So where does the power come from, to see the race until its end… from within” The first time that I heard that line I was watching Chariots of Fire, one of my favorite movies. I was moved, as I feel that a question like that really draws upon the deep within me. Of course we have all heard, “it comes from within, it’s inside, listen to that still, small voice,” and so on. But when I heard it combined with the word “power,” I paused for a moment. Watch the video below of a scene from the movie where the main actor falls while running, and still gets up to win the race. youtube/watch?v=I4e5Xfmc8zQ So many people have said to me over the years, “Philip, you must have such amazing willpower to have lost all that weight.” As much as I appreciate the compliment, I’m just not so sure that it’s an accurate statement. Of course I have willpower, we all do, but I don’t really feel that willpower is what I used to change and transform my life. So what did I use? Choice I know, choice?!?! What the heck does that mean? LOL It first started with awareness, as it usually does for me. When I was 400lbs, almost 5 years ago, I was so unconscious of everything around me. About the choices I was making, the food I was eating, and the life that I was living. I mean I was a sharp guy, brain smart, always quick on my feet, but unconscious and unaware all the same time. When tough situations happened in my life I usually felt like: (take your pick) 1. Victim (a victim of poverty, my genes, my situation) 2. Hiding away (hours of watching movies, wishing I was living another life) 3. Feeding the Pain (no description needed for that one!) Now, post-raw, things have changed a bit. I take time to pause a lot more often. I also question my motives, draw circles of awareness around my actions, and challenge myself constantly. I immediately face fears when I recognize them, and am still in the most wonderful process of fully letting go what others think about me. Woohoo, what fun! No really, it is. :) My time spent in presence has become my daily meditation. I inhale, and take in all the beauty around me. I continue to only affirm positive thoughts and words in my life, and in the lives of others. And most importantly, I continue to practice un-attachment, and being in the moment. Un-attachment from people, situations, the past, food, my reactions and/or thoughts and labels about food, people, situations, etc. I think that’s where choice comes in, in regards to food. Once I had the awareness about my eating habits, and the way that I was living my life, I had a choice to make. I could continue eating the way I was, and die before my time, or I could make a change. Now this is usually the time when judgement comes in, and people start telling others how and what to eat. Many times people want to “help,” but the funny thing about “helping,” sometimes it can be a bit more for the helpers ego, than the helped. My belief is we are all having a human experience right now, hopefully enjoying living in these fleshly suits. But saying that, this human experience is my own, and I can do with it what I chose, even if that means shortening my life by my eating habits. Yikes, that can be a hard one to swallow! (no pun intended) So where does the choice come in? Right here! How do you want to live your life? It’s that easy. For me, the weight-loss was a result of being sick and tired of being sick and tired. It was “make a change, or die” time for me. There was no guilt or self-judgement regarding the decision. I know that if I chose to just eat myself to death, it would be a shame, but it would have been my choice, and I’d be alright with that. But, if I wanted to make a change, it needed to be done then and now. I did, and thank God I did. A Choice. So that’s it. Your health and every other decision in your life is only a choice away. A choice to face your fears, a choice to be healthy, a choice to say YES to life, or a choice not to. No guilt, either way No shame, either way Just love…always and in all ways. I love you no matter what you choose. So take it easy on yourself. Nobody is perfect… and we are all perfect at the same time. Even raw gurus get out of hand at times, don’t let them fool you, lol. Remove the pedestal and see others and yourself the way you really are. And yup, sometimes I eat past being full (darn spicy food!), and sometimes I even consume foods or drink that I could have avoided too. But oh well, life goes on. I love myself no matter what. It’s my choice. :) And.. You have exactly what it takes to win the race, no matter where your finish line may lie. I believe in you. I believe in us. Always, Philip McCluskey
Posted on: Mon, 10 Mar 2014 03:37:15 +0000
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