--------Pirate England and Sorcerer Englands mobile phone----------- Pirate England: So tis wee device can send messages faster than a parrot? -poking the poor Samsung Phone with a stick on the table- Arthur: Yes! Will you stop that! -rubs his temples and picks up the phone- The little thing behind it is called Camera-- It can capture a view at the time you press this button here.-seats beside the pirate and focuses the cameras lenses on the Sorcerer England- Just like that for instance...... Sorcerer England: That contraption is emitting evil aura if you guys wanted to know... == -glares- Arthur: Hush you. That would be impossible. . -presses the button and lets him see the picture- ....see.... Now you have a memory of-- Pirate England: O_O SORCERER, YE LAD HAVE BEEN CAPTURED BY A WEE THING LIKE THIS!? Sorcerer England: -runs to see as well-ALAS! -points at himself- I AM THE TRUE SORCERER ENGLAND AND NOT BE THAT WITCHED ILLUSTRATION! HE IS NOTHING BUT A FAKE-- Arthur: -rubs his temples- Please.. stop shouting this ins--WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! PUT THE POOR PHONE DOWN! NO! DONT THROW IT AWAY DAMMIT! SORCERER THE DAMN PHONE ISNT POSSESSED! QUIT CURSING THE POOR THING! ------------------------------------------------------------------ *******Victorian England and the electric toaster********** Arthur: This is the easiest thing to use in the kitchen along with the electric egg beater. -and shows him the toaster- Victorian England: ........... I suppose it cant do much harm. Now tell me the instructions. -observes it closely- Arthur: Well first you grab some bread and then you slice it with a knife-- Victorian England: lad, i asked how to use the bloody contraption and not how to-- Arthur: LISTEN. Victorian England: -pouts- Alright, fine. Continue. Arthur: -puts the bread on the opening on the toaster- Put this here and then push this little lever down and-- Victorian England: A piece of cake then-- -does the same thing over the other toaster- ...... Arthur: Wait you have to--- Victorian England: What is that horrible smell....? Are all of the bread here in your Era smell like this? This is utterly displeasing. Arthur: -checks the toasters manual- Wait... i forgot something important! You have to.. Victorian England: ARE YOU SAYING YOU FORGOT SOMETHING IMPORTANT AND LET ME BURN THE BLOODY BREAD! Arthur: QUIT THE BLOODY SHOUTING AND JUST LISTEN WOULD YOU! --toaster explodes- Both: THIS IS ALL YOUR BLOODY FAULT, WANKER. -pointing at the other-
Posted on: Mon, 24 Nov 2014 08:29:22 +0000
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