12.Routine pays Routineless spends. 13.water wets wet mind flows. 14.Poverty is unbearable. Novelty is also unbearable. 15.Watch shows time. watch in life cautions. 16.Showing is good Showing off is bad. 17.Prostration pardons frustration kills. 18.Wonder produces happiness. Ponder also produces happiness 19.Animals obey Nature Man disobeys Nature. 20.Never do wrong things ever do right things. 21Full vessel makes noise Emty vessel makes all noise. 22.Nature gives Mature alo gives 23.Knowledge creats Wisdom implements. 24.Birds soar high Kindness also soar high 25.Goodness prevails everything calmness prevails in goodness 26.Kindness gathers people arrogance drives people 27.whatever possible do whatever impossible do not do. 28.Immediate action necessary Reassuring should follow 29Uprightness Pays crookedness kills. 30.Regurality pays Irregurality kills. 31.Storm devastates Turbulent mind also devastates. 32Hurried action leads no-where Un-hurried action leads everywhere. 33.The Sun shines Sons should shine. 34Clouds gather to rain Good thoughts gather to shine 35Good man gets every thing Badman gets nothing 36.Past is past present is present-Be present. 37.Blame on others kills Fame on others pays. 38.Blame game not good Fame game good. 39.Bravery pays Bribery kills. 40Life is wonderful. Provided we make it. 41.Hard work pays Tady work kills. 42.Never do wrong things Never do right thing wrongly. 43.Child like is good childish is bad. 44.Never do unwanted things Ever do wanted things 45.God manifests in everything Realise it. 46.To the advantage of one and to the disadvantage of many(Present day Politics. 47.Pl remember: One who knows- not is a knows not-shun him One who knows-not and knows that he is a knows-not-correct him One who knows and knows that he knows-follow him-he is a leader. By hanquill. Posted by mani krishnan at 8:11 AM No comments: HANQUILLS APHORISMS:- 1. Truth_ What existed 2.Money:- Progressive inhumanism. 3.Beauty:-to enjoy keeping at a distance. 4.Politics:- Not for Noblemen. 5.Honesty: A thing alien to-day 6.Promise:- what is never kept 7.Virtue:- what is totally outdated. 8.Faith: A non-existant. 9.Minister:-A man surrounded by muscle men 10.Marriage A tie for tomorrow. 11.Blunder:- Common parlance. 12.Mistake: What is taken for granted 13.Enjoyment:-An Action at otherss cost 14.Cleverness:-escaping and pulling down others. 15.Public servant:- A man destined for gratification. 16.Servant:- Who is waiting to strike his master. 17.Boss:-A symbol of idiotism. 18.Worker:-Who never works. 19.A college student:-A deliquent youth. 20.Bus:-Meant for un-safest travel. 21Sanyasi:- Areligious man of ill-fame. 22.Preacher:- One who never practices. 23.Student:- One who studies with more of other activities 24.Courtesy:-What is alien to day. 25.Advantage:- order of today. 26.Vanity:-existence of to-day. . .` Posted by mani krishnan at 4:16 AM No comments: 36. A class was in progress-suddenly a cat came and stared all_student-Now the cat is out of the bag 37. One student was crying in the class-Teacher-Wh do you cry?-Student- I cant bear you lecture any more-all laughed. 38.Teacher - What the news students?-Students- your Presence-all laughed. 39. A class was in progress-One student was thinking something else.-Teacher came to him and asked-Where are you- Suddenly the student woke up and said-defenitely not in the class- all laughed-Ha! Ha! 40.Teacher -what is the difference between -T and Tea- Student- I know- letter and spirit- all laughed Ha! Ha! 41.In a class-teacher asked students to write an essay and started sleeping-When he woke up he found that there was no body in the class-What? he found all have gone since the college is closed-Ha! Ha! 42. In a class two students were fighting and he watched and saidSurvival of the fittest-all laughed Ha! Ha! 43Teacher- I want peace- Students Granted-Ha! Ha! 44,Pointing to a student teacher askedWhat didi I say in the previous class?The student-sir I was in my previous class-Ha! Ha1 45.Teacher-Today and never-Student-Today and ever we make noise-Ha! Ha! 46 Teacher asked a studentWhy do you make noise always? student-:Father told me never yield-Ha! Ha! 47.Teacher - Will you remember me after leaving the college? Studens-How can we forget you?-Ha! Ha! 48.One student cried- all joined. Teacher asked What happened? - Students You only said-Unity is the best policy-Ha! Ha1 49.Teacher What makes wonder? Students-Attending your class- all laughed. Ha! Ha! 50.In a Biology Class teacher was teaching about snakes-suddenly a snake appeared-Teacher-Now we have practical.-all laughed. Posted by mani krishnan at 3:26 AM No comments: Wednesday, July 16, 2014 college jokes:- 12. Teacher read-war and Peace are part of the history-student-Sir-No exception to our class-Ha! Ha! 13.One teacher said-I dont like students being taken into task-student-we also dont like teachers being taken into......-Ha! Ha! 14.One student came late to th class_ TeacherWhy you are late?-Student- studying too much Teacher-Wonder! Ha! Ha! 15.Teacher I am going to retire tomorrow- students-atleast in future you will have peace-all laughed Ha! Ha! 16.Principal came to the class- looking intently he asked a studentDo you study well? I dont know sir-Ha! Ha! 17.Teacher- Students now onwards we should forget everything-students- including studies?-Ha! Ha! 18 A teacher in a class came to the last tow and saw a student was drawing his fiancees figure-On seeing that teacher said_ I think you are making plans for the future-Ha! Ha! 19.In a chemistry class the teacher asked Which is the most poisonous thing in the world? One studet - You- sir -Ha! Ha! 20.A teacher said- Students now onwards you should study well-Suddenly principal appeared and asked the teacher -What you have been doing all these days-Ha! Ha! 21.Teacher was reading a passage_ Clever students were preparing for the exams-One studentSir -this is not applicable to me-Ha! Ha! 22.teacher-I am happy the hall is full to-day. One student-Sir- last years students also joined-all laughed Ha! Ha!. 23.Teacher was reading a passageShe was shining like the Moon-One student-Sir-Did Armstrong Smith saw? Ha! Ha! 24.In the midst of the class teacher saidWhat a wonder! What a wonder! studentWhat? Teacher- you people are keeping quite! Ha! Ha! 25.Teacher said-Sorry I have staumuch ache -Student- But we have head-ache Ha! Ha! 26.a class was in full swing. The principal was watching un-noticingly.Teacher said Mind you- you cant take things for granted Our Principal is a very strict man Anybody making noise he will come and kill you Suddenly principal came and said pointing to the teacher -I wont kill them, but you- all laughed. 27.Teacher What you will do during holidays? One student_Sir I will dream enjoying a class without you.Ha! Ha! 28.A teacher who was a prestigious man said Students-You know I am a man of words-One student-We know sir we have no words to express! all laughed Ha! Ha! 29. Teacher said-Time and tide will wait for no man- Students- we will wait for another teacher to come all laughed Ha! Ha! 30.Teacher Today is Monday-One student -We know sir-tomorrow is Tuesday-all laughed Ha! Ha! 31.Teacher - your principal is a good man Student- unlike you sir-all laughed Ha! Ha! 32 Teacher-I will never forget you-Student- we are no as bad...- all laughed Ha! Ha! 33 Teacher-Today morning I quarelled with my wife and that is why....Students No problem you are in order today -Ha! Ha! 34.One student came late to the class .Teacher-Why late. Student- Sir -I go on the principle- Better be late than never Ha! Ha! Posted by mani krishnan at 8:48 AM No comments: COLLEGE JOKES:- 1.Teacher came to a class and said-To-day weare goig to make a study on Gandhiji-Immediately one stood up and saidSir-Please- he was a good man-all laughed-Ha! Ha ! 2.-Teacher said I cannot see properly the back benchers. Pat came the replySir -pl we have our own activities here-pl dont disturb.-Ha! Ha! 3.A lady lecturer was pretending that she was always for jokes-she made a joke-Unfortunately no body did laugh.She got angry and saidWhy cant you laugh? All laughed-Ha! Ha! 4.Teacher said-Boys take care of your studies-exam is nearing:-One stood up and saidWhat about girls?-Ha! Ha! 5.Teacher started reading a passage-Rome was not built in a day-One stood up and askedWhat about Chennai?-Ha! Ha! 6.Teacher told studentsStudents-I am out of tune to-day-Students- No problem sir -we have our own tunes-Ha! Ha! 7.Teacher-Girls- you can be models for boy students-Boys-Sir -they are already models-(for reality show) 8.Teacher-Whcih is the most difficult thing in the world?-Students-to become a student in your class-Ha! Ha! 9. Teacher was reading a passage- A thief entered a house and found nothing-students like your brain -sir-Ha! Ha! 10.Teacher was reading a passage_ Yesterday was really a good day-One student I cannot predict to-day-Ha! Ha! 11.One student was making lot of noise and teacher got wild and saidI think you have come to the wrong place .The student replied - You also-Ha! Ha! Posted by mani krishnan at 5:30 AM No comments: Tuesday, July 15, 2014 DOCTOR PATIENT JOKES;- 1.A villager went to a doctor- and told him about his problem-the doctor wrote down the list of medicines nd gave to him telling that this should be taken thrice daily.Impicitely the patient tore the prescription into pieces and consumed thrice daily.My God! he got cured-this actuallyhappened-as reprted in a news paper.-Ha!Ha! 2.A patient went to a doctor and told him that he is short of hearing at times-Doctor repliedI know I know-you wont hear, when I tell you about my fees.-Ha Ha! 3.One patient to the doctor-Doctor ,I find difficulty in walking-Doctor-Then how did you come here?-He replied I was told that you give free consultation, that iswhy..-ha! Ha! 4.Patient to the doctor-doctor at times I find short of memory and even forget my wife s name.Doctor replied-you are blessed-at least at times-Ha! Ha! 5.A patient to the doctor-Doctor I have pain all over the body Doctor replied-Sorry, I cannot spend so much time-Ha! Ha! 6.An 85 kg patient went to a doctor-Doctor now a days I find difficulty in eating doctor repliedYou are blessed-Go-Ha! Ha! 7.A patient went to a doctorDoctor my hair is getting grey Pl cure-Doctor Pl stop ageing- go-Ha! Ha! 8, A patient to the doctorDoctor-now a days I quarrel with my wife-Doctor-You are blessed-Go-Ha! Ha!.Ha! 9.Patient to the doctorDoctor-pl keep guessing-Go-Ha! Ha! 10 A patient to the doctor My hands are full of pain-Doctor-Pl find out anything else is left in your hands.-Go 11.A patient to the doctor-Doctor I am full of pains -Doctor Iam also-Go -Ha! Ha! 12.Patient to doctor_Doctor,I have pain head to toe-Doctor-pl find out any part left out.-Ha! Ha! 13Patient to the doctor Doctor-Now a days I get a desire I want everything-Doctor no problem-Pl collect the bill,...and Go-Ha! Ha! Posted by mani krishnan at 6:13 PM No comments: 25.A concert was in full session-two fellows started fighting each other for a seat and making noise-it reached the vocalist-he started singing- apparam paakkalam ippo vendaam-all laughed. 26.In a concert the vocalist started the famous songPaattum Naane Bhaavamum Naane-one fellow stood up and saidDefenitely not you-all laughed-Ha! Ha! 27.An insentient rasika entered through the back entrance,disturbing all rows and finally sat in the front row.Unable to digest, the fellow next to him told himthere is still room on the dias-he felt ashamed and became small.-Ha! Ha! 28.A rasika has been attending concerts for years ans still he had no idea of any raga or thaala.In one concert the singer was singing the most popular raagaThodi- Full of anxiety,the particular rasika stood up and asked the singer What is the raaga.Unable to digest the vocalist replied in noway connected with you.full of shame he sat down..Ha! Ha! 29.In a concert the vocalist was singing a raaga.Thougha seasoned rasika he got only half baked knowledge.He told the man next to him-this raaga...Is it not like(he could not complete).Unable to digest the man next to him toldas far as you are concerned it does not make any difference he kept quite full of shame.-Ha! Ha! 30.In music concerts at times the Ghatam vidvwan used to throw the Ghatam up and would catch with deliggence. Seeing this a cricket rasika saidWhat a catch. 31 A lady singer started singing Ennai pole oruvan.. one fellow stood up and saidHow is it possible? 32 A lady singe was singing and because of revolving fan, her sari pallu was flying-she was singingParakkum paavai naan-Ha! Ha! 33.an 85 year old singer started singingIlamayil Azhaku UnduHa! Ha! 34.A vocalist was singing,keeping his Gurus photo in front of him,On and off he used to touch Gurus photo and paid obeisance.(In other wards he was making his guru responsible for what all mistakes he commitsHa! Ha! 35.One singer started singing-Eppo Varu vaaro- one fellow stood up and said-Dont worry he will never turn up(Such is his anger)--all laughed-Ha! Ha! 36.One vocalist started singing-Paalum thenum Kalanthu-immediately the sabha secretary stood up and said-He! we cannot give you all these>-all laughed-Ha! Ha! 37.In olden days male singers used to havetout or kudumi-a singer was singingMaan Aada Mayil aada-one fellow stood up and said Your kudumi aada-all laughed-Ha! Ha! 38.One singer was singingEnakku Marupiravi vendaam- one rasika said to another Ok Ok we have enough of you.-Ha! Ha! 39.One vocalist was singingThedi Thedi Alainthene -one fellow stood up and said we know you wont get the right thing 40. 30 years ago a violin solo concert was in full swing..A lorry went on the road near to the sabha -horninPoing Poing.The violinist immediately made the very same sound Poing Poing- all laughed.Ha! Ha! 41.In a concert a singer started singing Ulakil Nallathum Undu Kettathum Undu-one fellow stood up and saidthat is why we are keeping quite-Ha! Ha! 42.Pointing to the sruti vocalist saidNeeye Enakku Athaaram-one saidwe know we know- all laughed Ha! Ha! 43.Pointing to the sruti vocalist sangUnnai Vittu Piriya Maatten- one saidthat is not appicable to you..Ha Ha! 44.Vocalist sangIthu samayam alla-one said we know we know but still we came.-Ha! Ha! 45.vocalist sang-Ulakathai Alappathu Kadinam-one said -but you have measured the entire stage by you movements.-Ha ! Ha! 46.vocalist sang-Maname Kalangathe-one said we know that is why we are here. 47.Vocalist sang_thaamatham eno-one said_mor late more benefitfor us.-Ha1 Ha1 48Vocalist sang-Enna Vanthaalum naan Unnai vida maatten-one said -We know we know we are helpless-Ha Ha! 49.Vocalist sang-Marupadiyum Varuven-one said-He! pl dont.....-Ha1 Ha! 50.vocalist sang Innam Orutharam - one said Never Never this is the first and last.-Ha Ha! Posted by mani krishnan at 8:22 AM No comments: Sunday, July 13, 2014 12. A vocalist was singing very badly-he started singing-Ennai Retchi Muruga-one rasika stood up and said-Not you but we ours-to hear your concert.-every one laughed violently.Ha! Ha! 13.A vocalist was singing with much difficulty-he sang-Va Va-one rasika stood up and shouted Dont worry-Muruga will defenitely come and help you.-Ha! Ha! 14A Music concert was in progress-suddenly a rat appeared on the dias-seeing that the vocalist siad-Ye! you are an un-invited audience-pl go-every one laughed.-Ha! Ha! 15.A veena concert was in progress- the lady artist found difficulty in playing because of pain in her fingers-but even then she was playing and as a result producing apaswarams.-One fellow stood up and said-He! we know you are in pains-but pl remember we are also ..-all laughed-Ha! Ha! 16A vocalist was trying to reach the top pitch-but even after making 2 or 3 attempts he could not make it .An impatient rasika got up and yelledHe! even if you try 100 times we know you wont succeed.-Ha! Ha! 17.A vocalist was singing very badly and at a particular point he forgot the next line and stopped suddenly.One impatient rasika-He! No problem- we are saved-all laughed-Ha! Ha! 18.A concert was in full session-suddenly a cat appeared on the dias and was mewing-vocalist said-thank God I got the right tune-all laughed Ha! Ha! 19.A concert was going-suddenly one rasika stood up and shoutedwe are unable to hear-the fellow next to him said-He! I was dreaming wonderfully -why do you disturb me? 20.One rasika was enjoying the concert and while doing so,he started making wiolent movements-the fellow next to him said -He! PL GIVE ROOM FOR OTHERS ALSO.-all laughed. Ha! Ha! 21.One rasika before staritng the concert saidOh! God! I have forgotton to bring my hearng aid- and said No problem-still I can enjoy the concert.-Ha!Ha! 22.A concert was in full session-One fellow laughed suddenly and violently.The fellow next to him asked him-He! pl let me know the reason-so that let me also enjoy.-Ha! Ha! 23A singer started singing -Eppadi than solvatho-one fellow stood up and said No problem simply go ahead. 24.A concert was in full session-the singer started singingKrishnan vanthaan-one fellow, a stanch Krishna bhaktha was in half sleep-suddenly he woke up and shouted Where Where?-all laughed-Ha! Ha! Posted by mani krishnan at 6:10 PM No comments: pammalhari jokesforall occassions Music Jokes;- 1.A Music concert was about to start,the vocalist-started tuning his voice---Sa Sa.Immedaitely a rasika in front row got up and said -Oh! Vocalist-what didi you see?( he meant saw} 2.A vocalist was about to start- vocalist tuned--Sa Ri--Imediately, somebody got up and said My dear ,everything is ok-Pl start immediately>(He meant Sa Ri means OK}Ha! Ha! 3.A concert was about to start-the vocalist with promise uttered and yelledSa Ni-a rasika got up and said Ye! why you are yelling SaNi(He meant the star Sa Ni}Ha! Ha! 4.A concert was about to start-vocalist yelled-Sa Pa .. a rasika stood up and said Oh! dearDont worry-you will have meals-( he meant -Sa Pa Du) Ha! Ha! 5.A concert was going in full swing-at some point in the seating there was disturbance and the noise even reached the vocalist.He immediately started singingVillayada Ithu Nerama.there was pin drop silence aft erwards.(Actually this happened in Krishna Gana Sabha in Mah. Santhanam concert and he only sang like this-what a clever man he was.}Ha! Ha! 6.A concert was about to start-the vocalist started clearing his throat and by opening his mouth one or two times.Suddenly a bunch of mosquitoes gushed in his throat-poor fellow he started making in- audible sounds and stopped singing abruptly. and the concert was cancelled.{ this happened really}Ha! Ha! 7.A vocalist started singing-Asai Mukham Marandu pooche--A rasika stood up and said-He! this is not the time to say all these( he meant.....}Ha! Ha! 8.A solo viol;in concert was in full swing-suddenly the string of the violin broke and he stopped instantly and said-the train got derailed suddenly -engineers are on the way-he made it alright and the concert continued..Ha! Ha! 9.A lady vocalist came and sat on the dias. Immedaitely one fellow in the front row said-Oh God !(she was in her full make up) but she heard this and shouted back to the man-He! Iam not God I am only a vocalist.Every one laughed.Ha! Ha! 10.A beautiful lady vocalist was singing-two lady rasikas in the fornt row started arguing-one said she must be forty only-the other said No No She must be only 35 years. It reached the ears of the lady singer-she shot back pointing to the ladies-He! friends I will clear your doubt defenitely after the concert.Pl listlen.They got ashamed.-Ha! Ha! 11.A violinist was sitting close to the vocalist and was playing violently and.at a given point his bow struck the body of the vocalist.The vocalist said-He! I know you are a famous violinist covering length and breadth of the country, but I am not aware -you are to this extentPoor fellow he stopped suddenly and became nervous.-Ha ! Ha! ByHanquill-PammalHariharan.
Posted on: Sat, 19 Jul 2014 10:42:41 +0000
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