Am facing my mid-life crisis and its not easy. Am sure am not in this alone and if you are not there, you are on the super highway there. Slowly slowly I am realizing I will never achieve my childhood dreams. Mid life crises occurs at about 40 when reality dawns that you will never achieve your life dreams. This is how the reality rudely awakens you. You one day report to the work place and realize you are receiving instructions from people younger than you, the ‘xaxa xema’ generation is graduating and getting promoted while you are taken to refresher courses. You realize that you will never have the title mkubwa at the workplace and since you have several loans you cannot switch jobs that easily. Having missed that promotion you return home miserable to realize one of the following scenarios. Scenario 1: If you started tasting these things after high school at age 20 most probably you got your firstborn then now that you are about 40 years then your first born is about 15-20 years. Say school fees, teenage rebellion, your children now realize that you are not as rich and wise as they thought when you they were younger. Now that you are 40 your first born is 20 and baby of snake is snake, then your firstborn is likely also tasting these things that means you will be a grandfather by 42, say inheritance, say self-denial. You are still living in a rented house or in a half complete house in Ruai you feel young but everyone else considers you old. Scenario 2: You decided not to taste these things early for you to complete your studies (masters maybe), get a good job, a car etc then look for a man to marry and start tasting these things … time check 35 years while your high school friend in scenario I is almost being called a grandmother / father your child is doing orientation of baby class. Yes you have a better car and complete house than scenario 1 but you fell the scenario 1 has a better social life this is the time you should be going to middle and top level management but you keep interrupting saying your family is young. While the scenario 1 friend can easily move from job to job and even be transferred since their kids are big you are not ready since yours are small. You admire the scenario 1 friend not knowing he is also facing his own mid-life crisis. Scenario 3: (ladies) you decided not to ever deal with KRA business of importing children into this world. Time check 40, you now realize you genuinely cannot get a child and the decision is irreversible you start worrying whether that’s really what you wanted in life now you start admiring scenario 1 who is now a grandparent and scenario 2 who is now a mother of a 5 year old not knowing they have their own mid-life crisis. Yours is an empty nest. So you meet on facebook and arrange for a high school or a campus reunion over the weekend. While choosing the venue you soon realize that you have all things in common unlike earlier days you no longer like loud music, junk food, and clubs with many campus children where they play music which you now consider noise. You now prefer foods with lots of greens not oily because of cholesterol, club with mature people such that even if you mess world doesn’t get out…. You realize you prefer zilizopendwa like E-sir, Maroon commandos, Kamaru, Ken Wa maria etc also a place will low volume music on the background to allow you to talk. When you eventually meet everyone admires the other but for a different reason, one is admired for having a nice grown up children while the other is admired for a nice car, job, house, one is admired for having gone abroad while another farthest he has gone is Rumuruti (like me) etc. The one with a toddler seeks advice on how to bring up a family and how to deal with house helps while the one with an incomplete house in Ruai canvasses for a job from the one who decided work first. as they night grows, they get tipsy and start getting tipsy they open up and talk about challenges of life and they realize no one is complete they are all facing mid-life crisis only in different forms. You have to end the party. You now, unlike campus days cannot party past midnight. You agree to meet every six moths. The one without a car, in scenario 1, borrows a lift from the one with the car and all go home either to meet your grandchildren not yet asleep and your children also coming home from a boogie party, or scenario 2, to find the toddler still crying or scenario 3, to find an empty nest waiting for you. The following week you will all reappear at the respective local pubs where everyone calls you ‘mkubwa’ everyone there is a mkubwa.You would have liked to earn this title from the workplace but you still doesn’t mind because here he can discuss all the things he would have liked to become but never became like football for those who wanted to become footballers and politics for those who wanted to become politicians but then that’s mid-life crises. Have a nice week friends as I prepare for my mid-life crisis.
Posted on: Sun, 08 Sep 2013 18:31:23 +0000
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