As you all know, Max Cardona recently provided us with a very entertaining recital of how his fishing trip went with Chrisjan Greyling a few weeks ago. I thoroughly enjoyed reading Maxs comical version but received an email on Monday from the one and only Chisjan turning the tables on skipper Max 😊 Enjoy - - here it is.. A day of fishing with the great Coglioni.. The morning started with restless sleep,, due to the knowledge that when I wake up I will be slaughtering the fish with the great Cardona. As always, I wake up 30 min before my alarm and I rush off to meet my skipper at the usual point. The day started as always Mosiline behind the helm shouting at the poor Gilly and new Deck Hand ,turn the noise u IDIOTS ,luckily the great CJ was there and without buckling under pressure manage to turn the nose into the 3 foot shore break .Im very happy with Cardonas Motors that started on the first swing these are definitely a great investment .IDIOTS !!, Mosilini shouted get on!!! and smiled and grinned . The grin was not for the safety of the crew but the love he felt for the new Big screen Fish finder GPS combo .As he switched it on all the navigation lights dimmed,,,,,, as the 40inch unit drew almost the same power as KOBERG ,I was concerned ,,,, but the prospect of catching a fish (FINALLY) outweighed the fact that my safety was on the line due to radio active emissions . IDIOT PUT DOWN THE probe ,,,, I looked over the side of the boat there it was a ginormous probe ,,they used them in world war 2 to pick up submarines at 3000nm at a speed of 50 knots .I have a theory on this ,which I will divulge at a later stage.. So off we go at 140 knots hold on IDIOTS HE SHOUTED ..! I was concerned at that point , due to the blinding light the Gps was making SKIP could not really see that well as the eyes of Skip was glued to the big SCREEN like A MOTH TO a flame . Dolphins the Deck hand shouted !!!! As we landed back in the ocean Skip shouted throw the plug IDIOTS,,, impatiently he grabs the rod hurling it towards the Dolphins who were having some romantic time in the moonlight ,,,BOOM ,as the 1 kg minnow drops next to the poor dolphin who was about to get lucky GREEN PEACE I HAVE HIS BOAT NUMBER poor animals .Theory GPS STILL ON Skip grins at the screen as we take off ………Barge ,he shouted, As we get there due to the altitude that we traveled at ,me and the deckhand cant really feel any of our limbs ,but quickly we drop and start catching bait as SKIP drinks a warm cup of coffee,,, staring at us over the cups rim ,to fill the live bait well fast ….Nice he says as we catch a bit of a mixed grill, as Skip would call it . Boom I thought ,,,, knowing how fish like to shoal around this wreck I had an epiphany let me bring the wreck to us ,after the third attempt I knew I would have to bring bigger tackle next time to pull this wreck closer ,Sorry skip I will plan better next time After doing some running repairs myself and the Deckhand managed to change the pump that wasn’t working properly, I think it could be due to the tremendous power the big screen was pulling! #Theory Bait on board SKIP looks at me and asks what direction ? I said in a soft voice south sir SKIP shouted North it is! As we took off he radioed Virginia airport in a fear of them thinking a UFO was passing at high velocity on the east of them but rather the great COGLIONI ! So after a 5 min ride we arrive at our destination - Umhloti Flaps down Skip shouted ,,,,,, LETS fISHhhhhh !!! SKIP SHOUTED ,,,,,We let out the poor baits that had the reverse benze from the altitude ,or as I would refer it as APS which means ALTITUDE POSINING SYNDROME …. Skip turned the big screen to level 5 that’s suppose to lure any crocodiles to the boat .I think he switched it to level 6 that will cause the whales to beach ,,,,But heard no reports in Africa so I recon it did the damage in Australia .I did notice the birds coming closer under the intense frequency that the probe was emitting,,, Im sure a couple of bats lost there ears ….If anyone knows of bats committing suicide please feel free to contact me! After a couple of hours of killing little reef fish with the sonar ,we headed off to deeper water between the ships .We started trawling. I noticed the water was green this could be because to the fish leaving feaces behind after skip landed in there vicinity … THEN A Big oil tanker hooted at us,,,to raise his concern about the high frequency that was causing their instruments to fail ……SKIP gave them the Italian salute BOOM … they then Hooted TWICE TO SAY SORRY . After killing a couple of deep dwelling reef fish with the sonar ,,,,,,,,,,I could hear a Lion roar on the boat this is a big boat and u never know what Skip could have picked up out of his garden - living in Hilcrest and all! I was scared but the Chuck Norris in me told me to not be afraid CJ was there to slaughter any prospective big five ,I WAS SAFE! The noise caused Skip the overwhelming need to have a burger at DURBAN SKIBOAT club - trumpeting calls from the deep of the captains bellows …….boom . We started heading back to base ,GPS STILL on, probably causing a couple of delays at King Shaka Airport ,,, We arrive at base the SKIP shouts at the tower can we beach ,the poor tower official gives him the thumbs up ,,,,the gps was gamming any radio signals …..#Theory What a day,,, then who else but the Amazing Ski boat club Receptionist there to welcome us home back alive ,,,,no Fish ,,, she grinned . We then ask how the Jet ski comp went ? Well she replied there was a couple off small fish caught nothing over 8 kg ,there was a report of a poor fisherman who got hooked with a treble due to a whale going off course and knocking his jet ski ,,,,,,,,, I just smiled that GPS WORKS ……SYNDROME …. Cant wait for the next trip boys!
Posted on: Tue, 15 Jul 2014 17:59:57 +0000
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