Can we not just go and get passport photos and leave it at that! Apparently not! Arrive in the post office at 1pm - dont bloody leave until half an hour later!!! I go into the booth. Put in my extortionate £4. A lovely voice asks me this and that and I respond doing all the right things and pressing the correct buttons. With a little giggle she says, You are about to have your photo taken, are you ready. I pull my serious face - scares me what looks back at me from the lense in front of me - that should be good - passport photos are meant to be scary!! Flash! I blink! Another set of instructions: Your crown should be on the lines - your chin on the bottom lines, accept or try again - nothing about having no chin and your eyes closed - oh well, thats not acceptable then. Try again button gets pressed. Lift myself higher - off I go. Flash! Oh God! I look like a giraffe - how did I stretch my neck that long! Try again button. Fifth try and I produce something that looks like draculas mother, but would be just right. Roys turn. Oh dear. Im sure by the eighth try the lovely voice had an edge to it! I was helping to position him then pulling the curtain and saying dont move. The first time in a very loving wifey voice, the eighth time through gritted teeth and with the gun already pulled out of my belt! At last! But no! Neither Roy nor me had noticed he still had his glasses on!! Bloody Hell four quid for nothing! Goes up to the counter and asks, Do you do B&B? The lovely Indian guy looks at me astonished. Having witnessed our antics he wants us out as soon as he can - not moving in! I will help you, he says, in a very anxious voice. Oh, I think we are well practiced now, thank you. I just need a bank loan and I will be fine. It takes a minute for my joke to sink in and then he cannot stop laughing. But he gets me my four coins! I position Roy again. Close the curtain. And HE starts to giggle and cannot stop. . . God give me strength! All I want is a bloody photo for the passport! Then it happens - the flash - I look at the screen - Roy, silly grin. Right, Im leaving you. Im having a divorce! Okay, Okay, Ill do it this time I promise. I am destined to live my life out in a corner Post Office!!! But now, he manages it. He takes a terrific pic and looks like George Clooneys dad. Wow. Hate him as now I have a Dracula mother image and him a film star one. Where is that lawyers telephone number? Anyway, I have one consolation Mitzi (the car) has already blotted her copy book, and been down graded to that bloody car! She has developed a stop-start jerky attitude and has to return to the garage today. Maybe the George Clooney she thought she saw the first time round has shown himself in his true colours..... Ha ha... good job I still love him ....Love you all xxx
Posted on: Wed, 17 Sep 2014 06:38:40 +0000
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