Dirty Half Dozen Its the Dirty Half Dozen because a person cant say anything back. 1. Being the custodian parent, is the closest youll ever come to a job. (Welfare people.) 2. The graduation march is Pomp & Circumstance Military March. To a parasite you can say, You have the circumstance. Why dont you get some pomp to go with your circumstance. 3. If academic levels were based on emotional growth, as opposed to reading level, people would submerge to Resource. 4. For a thief: You belong with Crosby and Nash because you Stills. 5. You need to take advice of Nat King Cole: Straighten Up and Fly Right while youre Too Young before you turn to Stardust, otherwise your life will be Unforgettable. In the meantime, take a trip to the nut house on Route 66. 6. The only depth a lot of people will ever have is debt. 7. Heres something for teen mothers: If your legs were like the Natalie Cole song Inseparabe instead of Journeys Separate Ways, you wouldnt be like Bluer Than Blue----a song by Michael Johnson. 8. You take the sym out of sympathetic and put the dys in dysfunction. 9. If you were the physical equivalence of you emotional abyss,you would be dead. 10. Sister is nothing more to you but a word that goes in front of Sledge. With you as a sister, I can save a trip to Itunes. You are my Twisterd Sister, Bad Company, Poison and Rat. When you are amongst the Grateful Dead no longer will you be around to Sting me with Cheap Tricks. 11. Here is something to say kids having kids: If you cant remember LPs, why do need an EPT? Had you had an IUD, you could be in school getting a GED.----at least. 12. It you werent there when I needed TLC, why should I care that you need ICU. 13. You are so superficial that if you were Ray Charles parent, Designing Women wouldnt have a theme. 14. Youre so superficial, that if Steve Wonder were you son, Jungle Fever wouldnt have a theme. 15. If Steve Wonder were your son, your relationship with him would be the title of Paul McCartneys first solo album.: Tug of War. The chances of you and Stevei making up would be the title of John Lennons last album: Double Fantasy. This is because being raised by you,is the title of a Beatle song: Helter Skelted.( Heleter is the biography on Charles Manson. Tug of War is the album with Ebopny and Ivory). 16. Youre so superficial that if Ronnie Milsep---a blind country singer----were your son, you would have taken him up Smokey Mountian Range In the Stil of the Night. When asked when you would pick Ronnie up, you would answer, Anyday Now. 17. If Helen Keller were your kid, it would take a miracle worker to get you to take her home from the hospital. (Keller wasnt disabled until she was 6 in 1887. (Annie Sulivan lived from 1866-1936. She was replaced by Polly Thompson in 1936 who died in 58. I forgot the last teachers name. Keller died 5 days before Bobby Kennedy azs killed on June 1,1968 at age 80. 18. If Stevie Wonder were your kid, he would still be Steveland J. Morris. 19. You are so superficial, if Ray Charles were your son, he would have remained Ray Charles Robinson). 20. You are so superficial that if Stevie Wonder were your son, your relationship would be a song Stevie wrote: Tears of a Clow. 21. When Ray got older, you would have said to him, When I learned of your condition, I felt Busted. As a result, I have A Song for You: Hit the Road Jack. People like that only want to hear one thing from their disabld kid: I Got a Woman in hopes of Ray leaving and never returning. 22. If you were to raise MacKinzie Phillps, you would have taken Mac one day at a time. Stevie Wonder is too handicapped to be the sunshine in your life. You would not mind taking Mac to drug rehab every Monday Monday despitre needing all the California Dreaming you could get. 23. With you as my relative, the closest thing to a family, is Soul Train. The theme from Soul Train was done by Mother Father Sister Brother and the three Degrees. (Its MFSB on Itunes). 24. Teachers are so superficial that if they raised Stevie Wonder, they wouldnt love him just because Stevie doesnt know the Ribbon in the Sky, from Ebony and Ivory and his Fingertips
Posted on: Thu, 28 Nov 2013 10:08:29 +0000
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