Dogs name: Callie. Callie whacks her tail against walls, people, furniture - whatevers in the way - when shes happy to see you. Shes ALWAYS happy to see you. But, I digress: Callie. Tail. Whack. From this we get her doggy baby talk nickname: Tallywhacker. That Tallywhacker is an alternate name for penis - well, it was a priceless moment when Zach realized what I was calling Callie in doggy baby talk, and laughing out loud pointed out how sick I was for calling our dog a penis in sickly sweet baby talk. Callie greeted me warmly this morning, whacking her tisk against me. She was fed a nutritious, delicious doggy breakfast, medicated for chronic, severe allergies and hypothyroidism, and let outside to do her business. Afterward, she took up her position in front of me in the hopes of sharing my delicious - if not very nutritious - breakfast of tiny, powdered donuts. This is how a typical, one-sided conversation between Callie and me might go in this situation. Mind you, you have to imagine me speaking to the uncomprehending canine in a sickly sweet, falsetto, doggy baby talk manner. Talkywhacker oo such a dood baby! Do oo wished-ed dat oo have a donut for ur breakstust? Maybe even just a widdle bite of donut? Even just a wiiiiddle bite of donut? And I wave the donut back and forth in front of Tallywhacker. She is mesmerized. Dont worry. I gave her a widdle bite of my breakstust. Im not cruel. And its not a totally one-sided conversation. She was drooling in response to my questions. It was a big, drippy, glop of drool. She understood me.
Posted on: Tue, 16 Dec 2014 12:08:14 +0000
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