Each and every day there is opportunity for growth. Mentally or physically - emotionally or cognitively. Ive always had an irrational fear of change. Ive always feared that if people saw me emitting compassion or happiness, people would stand over me. Ive always feared that if I showed weakness, people would use that against me in spite. I no longer care about who I used to be - or what people know of me. I no longer care if Im not ruthless or if the old Aris would do this. I honestly dont care that I no longer have the affiliations I used to have or the influence I did over groups of the boys. I do not care for the fact that I am simply no one anymore. The old me is gone - I no longer feel the need to prove my self worth to anyone else by knocking them down and standing over them. I dont feel like I need to stand toe to toe to prove that I was an alpha male. It no longer means anything to me. I dont mind the fact a reputation which can take years to build is able to be forgotten in a matter of months. I no longer serve for your purpose or for your cause. I will not fight for this, I will not die for this. This is not my war. Anyone who chooses to inhibit my growth and the decision to move forward in my life - I no-longer care about you.
Posted on: Mon, 27 Oct 2014 10:44:33 +0000
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