Good Dog tip: Not every dog likes, feels comfortable, or enjoys the company of unfamiliar dogs. And not every dog likes, feels comfortable, or enjoys the company of unfamiliar people. Its easy for us to have expectations and beliefs about how dogs should be, what they should enjoy, and what should make them happy. But when we dont honestly take into consideration (and honor) our dogs actual individual personalities, demeanor, limitations, and preferences, we do our dogs a massive disservice, and we put them at risk for possibly getting into serious trouble. I get many questions from folks and see many clients who have a vision of what their dog should like and dislike, and what a dog needs to do to be fulfilled. Oftentimes this vision is at odds with what their dog actually enjoys or feels comfortable with. The dog who is uncomfortable and insecure with other dogs having to endure another day at the dog park, and often getting into scraps or all out fights because of it. The dog who is uncomfortable and unsure around people having to be social when guests or over or a party is happening - being tense, growling, snapping, or worse. The dog on a walk who is shy and insecure having people come up excitedly to pet and engage with him while his eyes are wide with fear and his body tense and ready for fight or flight. These are super common situations that many dogs find themselves in. Often its because people feel their dog should like other dogs or people, that they need this interaction or socialization time, and sometimes just because people dont know better. But our job as our dogs leader and guardian is to protect and advocate for them. To understand and prioritize whats best for them rather than whats best for us and our wishes or beliefs. We need to be honest with ourselves about our individual dog, what his limitations are and what helps or harms. There no shame in saying my dog doesnt like other dogs, or that hes not safe playing with dogs he doesnt trust. There no shame in putting your dog away in his crate when you have guests over if your dog is terribly uncomfortable with that situation. Theres no shame in saying no to folks who want to pet your dog on walks if your dog doesnt enjoy the interaction, especially if hes tense or possibly dangerous. In fact theres not only no shame, but putting your dogs comfort and safety first (and other dogs and peoples as well) is actually your primary job and responsibility. Dont let others pressure you to compromise your responsibility or let them question your decisions. If you know your dog and you know whats best for him, than do it, and dont let others influence you. Social pressure, especially when it comes to our dogs is a heavy one. Stand firm, and challenge yourself to be assertive in the face of pressure. (Its good practice for life in general!) Of course we want to always be improving our dogs and their ability to cope with their world and to thrive in it, but we also need to temper that desire with reality. Be sure youre being realistic and fair to your dog. Dont put him in situations that overly pressure him, make him terribly uncomfortable, and possibly put him at risk for making a bad choice. Tune into your dog, be honest, and understand his limitations and honor them. And most of all, give you and your dog permission to always do whats best for you both, regardless of what mythical doggie stories suggest, or what others request. Your dog is an individual, be sure to treat him that way. :)
Posted on: Mon, 11 Aug 2014 16:00:49 +0000
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