Have you ever had one of those days... when you just feel like REALLY breaking down hard...and you do? You realize just how shaken up you are about something. You realize how real.. and serious your tough situation is. It is so scary and overwhelming that you start to shake in your voice during a conversation, and you force yourself to retreat to solitude in tears and sob away in painful silence. I couldnt finish... I couldnt complete my task. Sometimes I find myself wishing that time had a pause button so that I could frantically put all the pieces back together, and make something out of this wreck. What the heck am I doing? What exactly is going on? Why is this happening to me? Who am I? I know... that I really want to find out just what I can accomplish... But, why did I choose this path? I dont understand anything... It was my first time, if anyone else could relate to what Im talking about... It felt terrible. I almost gave up on a personal challenge I set for myself... That definitely wasnt good at all. But after thinking about it, I again realize that things are only just getting up to par in this new life. Here I am, being pessimistic about one bad day. I shouldnt have let the anxiety of it take over. After all, I set myself up, didnt I? I didnt. I didnt set myself up. I ENTRUSTED MYSELF... with my future. Im not the experiment, IM the one testing the new ground! I shall muster the courage I need, and push through, because the world is my experiment! Yeah, tonight was a complete failure, I admit, but I cant let the world get the better of me. If the grand scheme of things does really matter, then tonight is only a just lesson. It hurt, but Im still alive, and the goal is still out there, waiting for me.
Posted on: Mon, 08 Sep 2014 07:06:47 +0000
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