Hi my sweet buggley boo!!! Mommy misses you soooo much! Im finding it harder and harder to go to sleep at night. Its hard to make myself realize this is real. Until I join you in heaven there is no more snuggling you or kissing you and hearing you say you love me. God knows how much I miss all these things and more. Grief is a crazy think. Ive lost people I love. My daddy, my grandpas, uncles.... Its not the same as losing my baby. My heart hurts all day everyday. No matter what Im doing or what Im talking about its you in my mind. Theres no turning it off. I dont want to. You Devin and Rheagan were my special gifts from God, you just finished your lifes work a little sooner than the rest of us. As bad as I hurt I continue to thank God for letting me have you for 9 years! What Id give for you to yell kiss my hairy wolf stained butt one more time. I know that wasnt really you saying those things but they gave me the chuckle I needed to get through that moment. Life is different without you. Things I used to enjoy I dont want to do. I push myself for your sister and brother because they deserve that. I hurt for them that not only do they have to live with hurt but they have a mommy with a shattered heart. Love you so much bugs!!! See you soon!!
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 00:40:13 +0000
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