I have always wanted to say this but have always talked myself out of posting this, but today....I need too. I miss Jennifer McKenzie so much! I regret every day of my life on the way she and I left things before she died. We got into a huge fight and we said some really hurtful things to each other. Not a day goes by that I dont wish I could take back what I said to her. Not a day goes by that I dont think about her. Even though she is no longer here in a physical form, there is not a day that goes by, that I dont talk to her. She was and still is a major part of my life. When I walk by a birthday cake, dust, wash grease of my cooked meat (she hated greasy meat....like hamburger for hamburger helper), when I watch horror movies, see prom/pageant dresses and even when I het new shoes....I miss her so much. I apologize to her every day when I talk to her in heaven. I know she forgives me, but it doesnt make it any easier. Today I am missing her more than normal. There is so much I want to talk to her about, physically talk to her about. I would give my right arm to hear her laugh and tell me how crazy I am. Today is a dat that I wish I had her shoulder to cry on and let everything go. I can still feel her from heaven laughing at me when I do something stupid or funny....but feeling it is not the same as hearing it. After we fought, I didnt talk to her for a year.....and she died before I could ever talk to her again. You will never know how much that hurts me. She taught me a lot in life. ....even if I didnt realize it at the time. We would get in our arguments and not talk for a while, then we would apologize and live as it never happened. Who knew we wouldn never be able to do that again.......it hurts. I miss you Jennifer McKenzie. I miss you and love you so much. No one will ever know how much. I wish I could see you and talk, physically, with you.....just one more time. RIP girl......you are and will forever be....irreplaceable!!!
Posted on: Sun, 30 Mar 2014 18:00:39 +0000
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