I have been thinking about BOUNDARIES for a little while, prompted by a situation that I know of, in which this method of modern Christian-psychology has been put to use. Many years ago a book came out called Boundaries - it was all the rage in the small church that I was attending at the time. I started to read it, but as I did I saw things that were simply not the heart and mind of Jesus. I believe it helped to give people who hate submission and obedience the excuse to make that defiant reply to those who would advise them of the error of their ways to help them, Dont you tell me what to do! You have no right! You are being judgmental - dont you judge me! Those who were living in sin particularly, refused to change their ways, because they now found that they could hide behind excuses for their behavior, and those who had a beef with someone could hold onto their grudge without resolving the problems. Issues were NOT resolved, defiance became the norm. A dear church leader friend of mine some years ago (about the time of the publishing of this book) was 6 months into his Masters Degree in Psychology when he looked at it in amazement, packed his bags and left. He told me that THEY couldnt even agree on what was right or wrong, and every couple of years or so, they would change the boundaries because they werent working. He said it was just a mess of try this, try that. I know ONE thing - God never changes. Gods WORD never changes. HIS fences of love and protection around those who are His, never come down or change. His advice, His commandments, His wisdom, His love, His grace and mercy NEVER change but are infinite and complete. Jesus NEVER put up boundaries between Himself and the world, let alone those He was intimate with, or even acquainted with. He was accessible to ALL . He said Come unto Me....Suffer the little children to come unto Me......Seek Me..... Drink of Me.... even those who hated Him, the Pharisees who spat on Him and would kill Him, including His disciple, Judas, who betrayed Him - this amazing God knelt at Judas feet and washed them! How could He have been Who He was if He decided to put up barriers between Himself and certain people who rubbed Him up the wrong way? He commanded us to follow Him, His example, and to be LIKE Him in all of OUR ways. How can we love our neighbor when we say, I love you, but dont come near me, you keep your distance - I have a problem with you! NO!...the problem in fact is ours - not those we block out. The issues are OURS to deal with, something in us that is stubbornly refusing to die to self and if necessary, love what WE consider the unlovely. You know, I think ALL of us have been and sometimes still are, unlovely. But it is in those times we need to destroy the walls, the boundaries that we put up, and humbly admit we need Jesus to help us to find that thing inside of US that needs to die. And it is always our own self. We are offended, hurt, prickling at all the things that we feel uncomfortable about coming from others, instead of admitting that there is something inside of US that needs to change. We can choose to mark out boundaries, or we can choose to seek Gods help to LOVE the other person regardless of how unlovely and obnoxious WE consider them to be, to return kindness for hostility, love for hateful words, NOT returning evil for evil, but loving them regardless of their treatment of us. Dont know how to hang on the cross that we are commanded to take up EVERY day, and say, Lord forgive them for they know not what they do... as Jesus did to HIS enemies? Go to the LORD and ask Him for that love and compassion, and mercy that HE showed those who crucified Him. No boundaries there. God WILL help you, if you mean it from your heart. When we put up boundaries around us to protect our patch, relational problems are NEVER resolved, situations never cleaned up, Satan ALWAYS wins, He is ALWAYS the winner, and the one who hides behind the walls he has built around his sensitivities never grows and becomes strong, and never able to laugh off offenses, but putting up building blocks of anger and bitterness, stubbornness, pride, that simply lock out those we are commanded to love. Loving ALL men with the love that God loves us brings DOWN walls and heals wounded relationships. The first link in the chain that holds that door closed is forgiveness and mercy, without which God will not forgive us. (see Matthew 18:21-35, and 6:14-15) Have you hurt someone? - seek their forgiveness. Have they hurt you? - forgive THEM....70X7.....without reservation (boundaries). We must remember that our warfare is not carnal, but spiritual, and if we believe that another persons heart needs to be changed, then lets seek Gods help to resolve matters, as Jesus did. Put it in Gods hands and let Him work it out. Pray. Ask Holy Spirit to search our OWN hearts Pray, and be like Jesus - do the will of God. Now, having said that, God has been showing me that YES! There ARE BOUNDARIES! And we SHOULD have them! But NOT the ones I have mentioned above that keep people out, and even God. The boundaries that God wants us to have are spiritual ones. The boundaries around His will for us. They are fences that HE puts up around us, walls around us that He commands us not to penetrate, fences that He puts up to keep us IN and not out....like our earthly parents (should) do. THESE boundaries give us a sense of security, and peace, and the joy in our hearts that comes from knowing that our Abba Father loves us and cares for us with NO reservations. These boundaries are there for our good and not for evil. They are boundaries set in place, house rules so to speak, that help us to mature and grow in knowledge of Him. (See Ez.34:14, Jer.23:3, John 10:16) The largest of these boundaries is the command to love God with ALL of our hearts, with ALL of our souls, with ALL of our minds and with ALL of our strength. When we disobey this we leave the protection of the fold, finding ourselves wandering about in the darkness of the world without the Shepherd. The second of the two greatest commandments is that we love others as God loves us which is the ONLY way we can love ourselves. He also talks about Himself being our fortress into Whom we can run in times of trouble.... not to keep us out, but to let us in. But it is HIS house, and HE determines the house-rules by which we must live. If we want to rebel against them, He will give us our inheritance, open the door and let us go into the world and find out which path we took was the best - the hard way. I praise Him that He IS the God of second chances, and if we DO come to our senses and remember how awesome our home was with Him, repent and go back to Him He does welcome us home with open arms and great rejoicing!. His place is SUCH a GOOD place, well defined by boundaries to keep us safe and secure..... and our Father is such a GOOD Father. (Luke 15) He has promised us that when we are walking in HIS will, not ours, He hedges us about with his protection.(Psalm 139:5) Job was loved by God, a righteous man, Satan SO wanted to destroy this man that God loved and protected...Have You not made a hedge around him, around his household, and around all that he has on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. (Job 1:10), and it was only by God allowing Satan to harm Job that Job suffered so deeply. But there was still ONE hedge around Job that Satan was NOT allowed to penetrate - death. Job, humbly bowed to the suffering, never once thinking to curse God, but glorified Him.....and God finally restored ALL that Job had lost, but listen to this! - when Job had done that hard thing - AFTER he had prayed for his friends who had given him such a hard time! That was a righteous, selfless man giving us an example of humility, and selflessness. His boundaries were against sinning against God and his friends, his boundary around his own spirit was the intimate knowledge of the God he loved and served, and his desire to walk in righteousness, and for his family likewise to love and serve God and walk in righteousness. The boundaries that WE can and must put up are also spiritual, never aimed at people, but at the enemy of our souls, Satan. Surrounded by the girdle of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the helmet of salvation, the shoes of the gospel of peace, the shield of faith.....and to push BACK the evil that comes against us with the sword of the Spirit, the Word of God. (See 2 Cor.10:3-5) 1 O Lord, You have searched me and known me. 2 You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. 3 You comprehend my path and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways. 4 For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. 5 You have hedged me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it. 7 Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? 8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. 9 If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, 10 Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me....... 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; 24 And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:1-10,23,24)
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 19:30:30 +0000