I have forgiven disloyalty because I loved more than I hurt. But how do you forgive disloyalty after youve forgiven it? To love fully you trust fully. You trust one with your biggest fear and your biggest desire, because without trusting them youre not fully loving them, and thats not love. My biggest fear is to have children with different fathers and be alone, unmarried. My biggest desire is to have a family and raise children alongside a man who loves me. A man who can teach my son how to be a man, because I am not one, and my daughter how to be loved by one. When one knows your biggest fear and your biggest desire and chooses to take advantage of you because they know your biggest fear and your biggest desire includes them, and loving them unconditionally, that is not love. Knowing you wont be eager to re write your whole future youve planned together, and your childrens, over a mistake, intending to commit that mistake, is not love. Just as forgiving one for the same offense isnt forgiveness, but stupidity and weakness. & I am not stupid nor weak, therefore I am alone, unmarried, with children by different fathers, without a father figure to raise them alongside yet, and thats okay. I am not however, another woman who chooses to love and dedicate her one precious life to a man who doesnt love her. Betrays her. Flooding her heart with hate, that she will only regret on her death bed. I can never regret my children but I can regret a man. I wont do it. Im not sorry.
Posted on: Thu, 04 Dec 2014 04:20:55 +0000
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