I havent been on FB in quite awhile, and today seemed like a good day to post. Seems like lately I just havent felt like it or felt up to it. Im dealing with some pretty strong emotions and feelings and I dont think my happy pills are doing their trick. I want to start off by saying that despite this being the most difficult summer of our lives in so many ways, it has also been a very enlightening one. Weve learned more about ourselves and others and compassion of our family and friends. We have felt love in many ways. For each Wawa gas card, Giant gift card, ride to Fox Chase Cancer Center, Visa gift card, case of ensure, bag of groceries and for each gift/ check we want to say THANK YOU! We have always considered ourselves to be proud and self sufficient, however with my long term health issues and then Bills cancer, we have been hit hard financially. This has left our family in a precarious position. I am glad we are not the kind of parents that over indulge our children whenever we shop, otherwise it would be difficult to look in their eyes and tell them no, they cant have this, or do that. Our kids are faring pretty well. I am hoping we can do something simple before school starts, not sure what yet, but we will be thinking about it. These kids need to be kids despite our problems this is important for them. The other reason I wanted to post today was to give everyone an update on Bill. He has been vomit-free for 3 wonderful weeks and he is definitely past that. That was such a terrible thing for him. Sometimes when he moves quickly I jump up too looking for the bucket! With the cessation of vomiting comes the increase in eating! His doc told him on Thursday that he has a baby mouth and he will have to teach his mouth to accept food, like spicy or salty will have to start in smaller increments. He gained a few pounds. He has a long way/weigh to go...ha ha. They say it could be 18 months or longer to gain his weight back. Why is it hard for a cancer patient to gain when all I have to do is look at food and I can put 5 lb on? Ugh! We are expecting a call this coming week with a date for his PET scan. It has to be approved by the insurance and all of that, but obviously it should be covered. It should be around the 10th of September. This is what we are waiting for, the final prognosis, the final decision on cancer and the words we want to hear, that Bill is cancer free! An area of concern is a spot in his mouth that is still not healed. This spot is where the tumor was, it was big and it was also where the largest blast of radiation was pointed daily for 7 1/2 weeks. It is approx the size of my pinkie fingernail. It has a hole right in the center of it and it doesnt want to close up. We are told that it could be from the radiation and that it is stubborn about healing. There is also the possibility that it is still the cancer, thus the reason we are anxious for the PET scan. This hole will have to have some assistance closing up after the PET scan. Not sure how they will go about it, but it was mentioned that he may have to have hyperbaric treatment. The danger with leaving it is that it must be kept clean of food aka bacteria that can be introduced right into where the cancer was. So, everything is hinged on the results of the PET scan. I am anxious, I really want it done and behind us. Some great news is that Bill can go back to work part time on Tuesday, Sept. 2! He has to start out part time and really listen to his body. He has been through so much that he cannot expect to just rush back in full time. I know he is anxious for some normalcy in his world. He goes back to work the same day school starts for the kids and that is also the same day Halee starts first grade. Not sure how Ill handle all of that.. Let me end by sending out a big thank you to all of you that have reached out to us and shown your love and concern, some even wondering what happened, why I hadnt posted. As I said, my emotions are an undefinable mess right now. Its been a lot to deal with lately, and I just havent been myself.
Posted on: Sat, 16 Aug 2014 22:01:26 +0000
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