I really dont like mentioning my personal feelings at all especially on social media but, writing helps and stuff so whatever. Over the past 5 years, Ive been battling severe depression. most of the time all by myself. (mainly because I dont like talking about it) I have been in a position where I have considered taking my own life and no one should ever fell that way. Its not as bad as it use to be but, its still an issue. If any of you have been depressed then you know how hard it can be. There have been times when I would wish that when I slept I wouldnt wake up the next day. there are times when you feel like going somewhere far away and leaving everything behind. Its hard to wake up everyday and try to face the world out there when you feel like your life is meaningless. I have been in that position many times over in my life and it isnt a good place to be. But, every time Ive entered that door, I always think about my family and the friends that I have and how much they love me and how selfish it would be of me to act in a negative manner to hurt them. Its easy to focus on things youve lost or all the negative things that have happened to you in your life but, when you cast that all aside and think about what you have. it suddenly isnt as bad as it once was. I dont really know why I felt so compelled to write this but, if I had to think of something its probably due to all this holiday stuff. I guess what Im trying to say is, I am so thankful to have a family and the few friends that I still have in my life who love me. It is easy to forget no and then when youre depressed but, without them. I may have to admit I would probably be dead. soooo I guess what im trying to say is Be thankful for what you have and try not to ever worry about what you dont have. I am very blessed to have who I do in my life and I would never trade what I have for anything. So yeah, as awkward as this was for me.. for those of you who are having the same battle, stay strong. I know how it feels and I know you will overcome it. no matter how bleak it may seem. never stop fighting and always remember that there is always someone who cares about you more than you no..... Now, back to lyrical statuss for me!
Posted on: Sun, 14 Dec 2014 03:45:44 +0000
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