I still cant believe it has been an decade. The thing is in a way this was not the bad day as he found peace. But it was also the day that it hit me,made me wake up from whatever dream I was having.Sorry that I am not very cheerful or anything......I have been dealing with people that got upset by a person they knew for a few months lying to them....yes it was a stupid lie. But I have actually lost friends and love ones I knew ,for a lifetime. I watched them get old and get weak right in front of my eyes. I never got to tell my Dad how he made me feel,and I that I really did not hate him I pitied him,for he was a loser because he gave up on us and himself.When I was 8 I saw a kid I played with carried away in a body bag because his mom thought hiding in a bathroom would be a safe place. Yes I was 8 when I first met Death....not Mickey Mouse or Big Bird .....DEATH ....and I have been afraid of it since. The psychologist thought I had a dark mind because of the pictures I drew,and the thoughts I had.Even before I lost my friend ,I knew fear.My Dad did not sing me to sleep and tucked me in. He would hit my Mom while I listened, he would smack my face if I talked to him. People wonder why I cant sleep at night and why I dont trust people....... So yes a friend of mine left a decade ago today,death won and took him away.I was there I helped him though it,not some stranger I think I knew. Not some drugged out grunge singer or a actor that met his prime. So yeah I am melancholy at times,because time went by so fast yet so slow ......and I just dont know if it is okay to dream anymore. youtube/watch?v=Iiwda8vqMe4
Posted on: Mon, 24 Mar 2014 03:51:30 +0000
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