I stopped at the grocery store yesterday on my way home from a security detail. I had some store coupons I wanted to use, and while I was looking over the dairy case, trying to find a particular cheese, I heard a woman talking behind me. Always being mindful of my surroundings, I ventured a quick look, thought she was talking on her phone, and minded my own business. Then I heard her say, You can ignore me all you want, but Im talking to you! I turn around, and shes a stranger to me. She proceeds to follow me around, commenting on my choice of cheese, and the coupons I had, and yada, yada, yada. Im tired, in a bit of a hurry, and really dont go to the grocery store to enrich my social life. So I manage to politely slip away, giving up the other items in the dairy case for a shot at freedom, and proceed to hunt in the opposite direction for the ground chuck thats on sale. On my way, I run into a guy I know, who introduces me to his wife, but he isnt there for the social life, either, so we move on. Making it to the meat case, and theres no ground beef on sale. Ive already tried to find an employee in that department to no avail. A woman moves in, and is apparently also looking for the sale beef. I say Im going to the butcher shop dept and ask them. She trails me. I ask. The guy working says theres just one one pack back in the back. I look at the woman and suggest scissors, paper, rock?, but she says she got some steak on sale, and Im welcome to the ground chuck. So I take it. By now, Ive forgotten half of what I came for, and decided to head for the ice cream. Havent had ice cream in a long time, and theyve got the good stuff on sale. The steak lady follows me, and gives me a 15 minute education on how Edies slow churned ice cream is made to have fewer calories and all the flavor. Oh, dear Lord! At this point, all I can think of is escaping. I promise to try it (like THATS going to happen!), and when she turns for the ice cream aisle, I go full steam ahead for the check out. Managed to escape without running into any more members of the Barb Fan Club. I headed to my truck so fast, I probably left a trail of groceries flying out of the cart! Dont care!! When I stopped at the store on my way home from the Sheriffs Office, I could kind of see why people thought I was approachable. but Im wearing a shirt that says SECURITY, not Sheriff, and I generally dont want to chit chat! I was thinking about the collars and vests for dogs that say DO NOT PET, and maybe Ill have a shirt made that says, DO NOT F##KING TALK TO ME! I BITE! I dont know. Maybe a little harsh? :)
Posted on: Thu, 18 Sep 2014 01:34:51 +0000
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