Im asking for prayer for both myself and my husband. He is terminal, and on top of that he has a form of cancer in his bones and or blood, tests are still being looked at. He is my love and partner in life, to whom I have given so much of myself. We moved recently, it was very hectic and fast and well, I do not remember all where all things went, we threw so much out, that by the time I remember we dont have it, is when we are looking for it. I kept a few items for Christmas, its not much, but before I could get out to get those few items, hubby wanted the nativity scene. I couldnt remember if it was thrown out or put into a sale lot. He now is upset w/me because I dont remember. Im hanging on by a thread trying to get all the things done on a reg. basis, let alone what still needs to be done for my hubby. He is mad at me, well I spent some hrs. in our storage area and found the wreath that he had done up for me. this I knew I kept. But cannot find the little tree, and finally my friend who is holding some of our things for sale, she found the nativity set. I came home and he already had the kitchen table down and is packing things of his to make easier for when he passes. WE do want to move again, as where we live is a bad place and many other problems. it was a mistake to move here. I understand him being upset with me, but he now doesent want a Christamas and refuses to talk to me, and acknowledge me. He has little time and this nativity set I got at a yard sale, had only a few yrs. is an expensive set, but I guess it meant allot more to him, than my feelings as a human. Ive done allot for him, did not shove it in his face, as his wife, I have done allot for him, bend over backwards and all because of this THIng it has caused a rift that has wasted so much time. and now he is just going over all the history of bad things I have done adn whatever else I disappointed him in his life. I just wanted to spend as much time with him as possible and now he is shutting me out. Please pray for both of us. Im just hanging on, litterly just surviving each day and just hoping I make it. I have done the best I can with what I have. why he is this way, he thinks things are more important and its hard for me to understand, as he cannot remember all the drunken things he has done including decsions I left him do and just live with. I do not have anyone to go to physically to get a respite, and I know in time he will need hospice, not sure how long that will be yet. I just want to live,but living in my soul is gone, I beleive life it just too broken anymore. I beleive in the power of prayer. Im only human and have many flaws. as my hubby has pointed out. Im not rich nor am I smart i ways of money, I just make do. all I have done has been for him, and he thinks this is all for me. We both need prayer, Im sure more can be doen, but what I dont know anymore. I dont have the strength inside anymore, I dont feel well and so tired adn living is hard to do anymore.
Posted on: Sun, 30 Nov 2014 21:53:56 +0000
Trending Topics
© 2015