Insert 30 After bobo left glad n i jst chilled n talked abt anything we cud thnk xcept joe till she brought it up. Glad: so wat happened Me: meaning Glad: u knw wat I mean Me: I dnt read minds u knw Glad: come on did he do it Me: do we really have to talk abt that Glad: ok lets talk abt how u feeling abt all this Me: I have no feelings whatsoever Glad: hai mani Precious u cnt keep everything bottled up I realized she was very angry n it was the first time she actually called my name in full Me: he glad if u r feeling guilty n pity for me. I apologise bt u cnt force me to feel Glad: sorry pumpkin I really am bt all dis will consume u got to let it all out Ag man glad was seriously pissing me off I needed to deal with this in my own way n the bestway I knew how to deal with it was denial it works for and actually nt feeling I like glad bt nw m nt likng dis Me: tnk goodness it will consume me nt u glad so let me be Glad: pls let me help Me: ok u wanna know wat happened yesterday Joe came here told me today he aint taking nonsense he wants his things so he kissed me all over and put his finger in my punapuna like lolly calls it hurt then he started to penetrated with his thing I blv u call it a dick n ithe pain was unbearable I screamed( she interrupted me) Glad: stop it pumpkin pls Me: m nt done then he got up n I thought he had heard my plea and decided to stop bt no he came with a rope tied my leg spread the right with dis leg n the left with dis leg then he penetrated it was so painful I thought that his thing was moving in my stomac that’s how big it felt. Glad: tried to put me in her arm bt I pulled away Me: he had his fun then he pulled out kissed my forehead and sai thank u Glad: u didn’t have to say it like dat Me: and oh today he said he wanted me to heal first I told him to continue n I wudnt even scream n he made me suck his thing then the whole episode replyed itself from yesterday. So glad nw that u knw everything that happened word for word do u feel better Glad: pumpkin do uthink I wud feel better Me: I thought so, so wats the point of talking abt it I dnt see Glad: I meant how u felt abt everything n twat happened n it may help u heal Me: lets see I was fuming with anger n I resented joe I wished I cud kill him then I decided feeling that pain was too much n I convuenced myself I have no emotuions any more Glad: bt u do n u hurting Me: nah hurt is for ppl hu feel n I dnt so no my sweet nanny Glad: no dnt sut ur feelings u need them Me: for wat to remind me everyday that my life sucks Glad: it human to feel Me: then I chose nt to be human any more Glad: dnt say that Me: I already did n did joe allow u to sleep here Glad: want me to leave Me: jeez I asked a question nt ask u to leave Glad: yes bt that’s if u dnt mind Me: we both know u wud nag me till I let u sleep here Glad: laughed I went off the bed n started walking man walking was more difficult thsan yesterday n glad npoticed I saw the pain in her eyes bt blv me u it didn’t even touch my heart at all it was like my feelings were dead I put on my pjs n glad did the same Glad: lets pray before we sleep Me: to who God or badimo coz me n God dnt talk n I think prayer is a way rto communicate with God so nah u cn go ahead The astonishment in glad face was unbelievable Me: wat didn’t say u cnt jst said I wnt join with that I pulled up my covers Glad: dear God thank u for seeing us thru today n may u be with pree my pumpkin during thi ( I interrupted her) Me: u cnt mention me to God I said we have no relationship wat soevr glad ignored me n continued Glad: this tough time I knw she didn’t deserve it at all bt help her thru it n protect us In my mibd iwas like if he cn protect us tonight why didn’t he protect me last night why didn’t he save my mom why didn’t he save me from joe. She finished praying got under the covers Glad: nyt nyt n I love u Me: nyt glad I cudnt say them bk coz I felt like everyone I love dies n I lose things I cherish most like my viginity. Eventually I slept.
Posted on: Mon, 22 Sep 2014 18:15:10 +0000
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