Ladies...if youve ever been bailed up by a person selling beauty products you might relate to this cringe worthy story. --------------------------------- So I was doing my usual shop at my less than favourite place on earth, Eastgardens, when I made the fatal error of crossing paths with a sales guy at the bottom of the escalator selling ‘Mineral Beauty’ or ‘Beauty Mineral’ products. Whatever. I cant remember. Bugger! I thought as he aggressively thrust one of his business cards into my hands. I instantly got defensive and was thinking of a quick escape but the nicer me decided that honesty is always the best policy; “Listen, you can’t sell me this product today because I have my superpower sales deflection force shield up.” I even did cool hand movements to prove the force shield actually existed. “But look at you eh, you look so beauuuutiful”. And he gives me an approving once-over. (To give you an idea about his sales style think ‘Watto’ the junky spare parts dealer in Star Wars’. Got it? Good.) “Well if I’m so beautiful (I looked like shit in sneakers by the way) why would I be needing your product?” Clearly stumped by my obvious comeback he quickly changed the subject. Grabbing my hand and peering freakishly deep into my eyes he continued, “You have lovely brown eyes. You know most people in Australia have blue eyes.” (I mean I love a good outrageous stereo-type as much as the next person but umm...) “That’s not true.” “You know brown is coming back into fashion. “Well that’s a relief. I hate to think I have unfashionable eyes.” (I didnt have the heart to tell him that I wasnt sure when his green eyes would come back around but in the meantime he should just sleep.) Now I don’t like to be impolite but this stranger had my hand in his and I’m feeling just a tad uncomfortable. I don’t want to be rude but it was time to be firm with the young man. Prising my hand away I say, “Listen I don’t have fifty dollars to spend on your creams today but I’m sure they are excellent.” “You mean three hundred and fifty dollars.” Blank stare.Two painfully slow blinks. (Have I have ever been a worse target market apart from those emails trying to sell me a Russian bride? Although I must admit I could do with a wife.) At this point I think Watto and I realised that this conversation was well and truly finished and despite our bizarre exchange we bid each other a kind farewell although as I walked away I noticed him shaking his head as if to say, Why do I always get the weird ones? Have a great week. Avoid the rain and the escalators!Take the lift! Kx
Posted on: Tue, 26 Aug 2014 04:05:17 +0000
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