Living A Lily- Livered Living Mahboob-Ul-Alam 4 Dew On Rose The expression of my inner feelings Reflected in my fourth collection of poems Is inspired by my wife Who helps me in every sphere of my life And makes me express my inner feelings In innumerable streams. I am very much indebted to Esteemed Major General Jalaluddin Ahmad, ndu, psc Adjutant General, Bangladesh Army And Chairman, Governing Bodies of Cadet Colleges For kindly permitting to publish the book And my ex-Principal Mr Rais Uddin Ahmed For his kind cooperation and blessings The Bangladesh Observer Bounds me in gratefulness Publishing most of the poems of this collection. To all of them grateful and thankful I am. Without their inspiration and help My inner feelings would not bathe in sunlight And would remain in darkness. So I express my gratitude to them once again. In fine, special thanks are offered To Mr Wahiduzzaman for cover design And Mr Masud Hasan To take all the troubles To bring the collection out perfectly. 5 Contents Solitary Shelter - 7 Sky Rendered Shadowy - 7-8 Sovereign Supremacy - 8 Hundred Miles To Walk - 9 Blooming Like Rose - 9-10 Moonface With Milksmile - 10 Trophy - 11 Wet Earth Becomes Warm - 11 Pitch - Dark Night - 12 Worth - 12 Etcetera - 13 Rhythm Of Life - 13 Being Deserted In Desert - 14 Becoming A Big Rose - 14-15 Moon Is Broken - 15-16 To Make Heart Ache - 16 Achy Wham - 17 Palmy Noon - 17-18 Black Dark - 18-19 Myself To Myself - 19 Onerous Feel - 20 Cheery Greeting - 20-21 Effusive Feel - 21 Water Makes Rock of Ice - 22 Not This Alone - 23 Know More - 24 In The Obscure Dark - 24-26 Louring Look Of Cloud - 26-27 Crawling Dark - 27-28 Narrow Bottle - 28 Wrecked Mass Of Ice - 28 Clandestine Chuckle - 29-30 Stones Are Embedded - 31 Sorrowful Memory - 31-32 Frison Of Delight - 32 Globules Drop Pit -a- Pat - 33 Manna From Heaven - 33-34 Sinking Spree - 34 Heady Feelings - 35 6 Solitary Shelter Powerful one can give you pain Peace and prosperity too So it is wise to be patient At times of disaster and distress The patience may be the only shelter If I count my sins and faults It is easy to accept pains easily It may be balmy If heart is soft and obeying Patience can pull on success He who can govern himself Is more powerful And he never becomes torn pages In a colourful cover Golden is patience And a sine qua non it is Barisal Cadet College 19 August 2002 * Published in Observer Magazine on 17 October 2003 Sky Rendered Shadowy In a gloaming dusk We remained sitting idle Under a tree Birds were singing and joying And breeze was blowing pleasantly My heart garden was dressed Artistically Your shiny untied hair Were flying in the air Cloud became thick And breeze inflamed 7 Canvas of my heart Was brightened dazzlingly Wings of my heart. Landed in your airport We were in jovial temperament The sky rendered pleasantly shadowy I was lying on your pleasant lap And breeze was blowing softly You slightly bowed down with bashfulness Kushtia 30 August 2002 Sovereign Supremacy There is none to be worshipped except Allah. Only He is Everliving,Everlasting Nap nor sleep can touch Him. In the skies and the earth Everything is only for Him Who possesses the capacity to recommend To Him without His permission ? Omniscient is He Everything vigible and invigible, past and future Are known to Him. None can have a little fragment of His wisdom Without His wish. His great Supremacy is pervaded Throughout the universe He is never tired To preserve the skies and the earth (with great care And His great power.) He is the Loftiest, the Greatest and most Prestigious. ( In the light of Surah Bakara – 2 : 255) Barisal Cadet College 06 September 2002 8 Hundred Miles To Walk My perforated heart is full of trembling darkness And garden is bare and empty And hope-lamp is put off I never find any light Frustration crawls towards me And burnt hope cannot see Any lamp-house I am to walk hundred miles Across the Atlantic Heart is broken into pieces Like glass And life - music is lost To run in easy path Is not so easy Could I have sun - bath day again ! Barisal Cadet College 03 November 2002 Blooming Like Rose Excelling even the swan in beauty If you swing clasping my neck In nose to nose position Your sweet-smell breath touches my face It may flash me mildly And be vibrated slightly Rattle sounds of your ear-ring Bites sweetly Your nose may be inflated And lips manifested You may bloom like rose We may swim in soothing stream And rose of lips may be taken up 9 And sail across the endless sea Blooming like a big rose And me can by your brimful heart Be overflowed with pleasure Barisal Cadet College 16 November 2002 Moonface With Milksmile If I reach the auspicious time And if you open the window I can lighten your lamp And enter into your brimful heart And our hearts can be fired By blazing fire If I can follow The theme of your inmost feeling I can be vibrated by emotional spark And if the sun about to set Looks upon you in amorous glance Behind the screen of dense cloud And the wind blows the light out I can put my lips on your fair nape Waves can rise upwards To make us bold And the wind robust It may be a pleasure of a sweet dream Barisal Cadet College-Jhenidah 19 November 2002 * Published in Observer Magazine on 19 September 2003 10 Trophy Worth is no where rather lost We patiently endure blemish melancholy But it curls the hope And put the lamp off Trounced and pinched too One may have not any trophy Life may be colourless Black And white stains Barisal Cadet College-Jhenidah 19 November 2002 Wet Earth Becomes Warm When I was asleep You laid yourself on me And put your lips on my cheek And knuckled It was slendid but not predicted Hundred lamps were flamed Inner waves rose high Blood flooded boldly Brimful heart with love flourished Blazing fire burnt our skins Wet earth became warm And thirsty earth was sown And a scent spread out And surroundings became veiled of dews On grassy mat Softness has its sweet grace Ganraganj 19 November 2002 11 Pitch-Dark Night Door of my room is broken And I am insecured My hope is roasted and crippled Lamp - house is invisible I become impatient to endure melancholy Being always horned and hit It curls my hope and put the light off My flower is full of invisible thorn I am abased and deserted And it treads on my corns And pitch - dark night is my life Ganraganj 19 November 2002 Worth What is the significance of worth Does it possess a tall physique Or fat sphere Or is it a thick paper And what is the scale of it And who holds the scale Who, the vehicle of the worth Is to be measured Easy to turn the scale But difficult to hold Ganraganj 19 November 2002 12 Etcetera Men ornamented minor - aged wife To make ease to rape them And to ensure knowing their movement And to censor too And to chain too So earing, bangle Aanklets with jingling bells Etcetera are made Ganraganj 19 November 2002 * Published in Observer Magazine on 26 December 2003 Rhythm Of Life Rhythm of life cannot be heard always He who can hear it is lucky enough And life is smooth and lucid for him Victory always kisses his feet Vernal breeze touches his life And hope lamp always puts on He always feels the significance of life He never be haggard and horned Rather halcyon And never be attacked by myopia Not this alone but he names his name In the long period of history And his life cannot be overcast Ganraganj 19 November 2002 * Published in Observer Magazine on 12 September 2003 13 Being Deserted In Desert I am in continuous ache for you If could dip into your belly - dent And have the opportunity To have a fingers breadth - touch If sleep - smile makes a dimple On your sleek glittering cheek And if you buy me by paid love If your lovely shower Makes my dry leaf young And if you become able - loved And if you read you in my eyes Then we can be happy Being deserted in a desert And can overcome the fathomless fatigue Jhenidah 26 November 2002 * Published in Observer Magazine on 21 November 2003 Becoming A Big Rose If we were to a far-off country It would be an emotional fantasy We could feel our full extent Young breeze would blow by our faces And we would bejewel Your veil would balloon in the air And your dignified grace would unveil We could remain in breath to breath 14 You would have a lot of go And become generous And try to gee me up And we get off together For a while we would become one Within a great beatitude In the deepest balmy privateness And we could begin to hobnob And that would be vastly looked for Delighted imagination of a fair madness And solitary silence I could be burnt in the fire of your politeness Edge of your saree would kiss Your fair-footed egg Softness of virgin twins could swim in the air And ourselves could become a big rose In a flower-bed And we could pluck roses From each other What a gorgeous play it would be ! Barisal Cadet College 07 January 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 02 January 2004 Moon is Broken So songs, so desires I have But now deserted – dried Ache spreads under skin And fires the skin Melancholy flows the heart An Echo comes forward shrewd shrill shuffles and shoves the life And bad govern governs badly Drunken surrounding batters me In felt obscurity to abandon the hopes 15 Reputation is horned and cannot re-run I am looming in the heart of darkness For an eon living in an abject misery The moon is broken in my mind-wave And my dream is snatched and abbreviated Becoming a broken reed Barisal Cadet College 07 January 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 10 October 2003 To Make Heart Ache Scope of feeling well Is squeezing day by day We cannot swim in storm of joy Thought - acuity is going down Becoming figures we appear merely ridiculous And are muddled and mauled By bullies and boors Remaining in a dungeon And on the point of needle And hurt by pointed rebuke Bang does not stop biting his nails And this goes at our hopes of prosperity And we are going to the bottoms And aching all over And hurt by cruel barbs of ridicule That makes our hearts ache We do not know if we bounce back Barisal Cadet College 25 January 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 07 May 2004 16 Achy Wham Roof of my self control Falls on me I, most hopeless being a roasted heart Cannot overcome the hindrance To remain lackrest Difficult it is Instead of touching your finger Without you life is bare and empty Garden without flower I can not be wet Though your body -smell Surrounds me Barisal Cadet College 07 February 2003 Palmy Noon You came in a restful palmy Friday noon And put on innocent look Hundred lamps put on my heart Lifting the Atlantic Having a junoesque beauty with interested look And you did allow me To come to let me in your lotus-heart Flowers of your garden were opening We were parallel to each other Brightness of your eyes was breaking I kept my trembling lips On your fair nape Deep lustre of your slick skin 17 Fragrant warmth of your springed twins And magnetic smile lifted the Atlantic We passed a precious moments Of happier times Pleasure was danching cheek to cheek Barisal Cadet College 08 February 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 12 December 2003 Black Dark He locked her arms in the back And placed his sandpaper lips On her very brightly blazing nape And started to brush her sleek cheek And tried to take luscious taste Of her rose - lips And have a bubble - bath And thrash the softness of virgin twins And use like a bedsheet of rest house The moon was carved in her mind - wave And her dream was about to be snatched The bad did not end goodly Rather long melancholy Trembling breath came out From the innermost core of her heart She tried to take luge 18 Of a new life and breath But burnt wing covered with frost Could not fly She was searching black cat In black dark Barisal Cadet College 15 February 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 16 January 2004 Myself To Myself You kept the sun out of your eyes And became a kaleidoscope Being a junoesque in an ironic manner Your upper array was not letting in at the waist So I could not turn my eyes Languishing sigh could not reach you I could not lay my palm On your dazzling shoulder And untie your bun And smell your glossy hair And take rose of your lips I was burning with longing And could not be entered Into your kernel Rather kept myself to myself Barisal Cadet College 23 February 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 09 January 2004 19 Onerous Feel I become unable to lope off From eccentric idea I am the one Who lost out with achy feeling And it becomes a terrible catastrophe I am aggrieved and agitated By bearish aggressor And barbarous cruelty That begets melancholy I am always burnt with ache And horned by perpetual hit Barisal Cadet College 26 February 2003 Cheery Greeting At time I feel alone and distressed When I remember you I cannot remember Your greety appearance and sotto voce voice I lose myself in an abstraction I get rather lost searching to find you And feelings are moving in broken waves I cannot exchange pleasantries with you And feel secure with shameful wish I cannot bear mere loveliness And hear chuckle of laughter Beamed with cheer And express your wistful feelings In a bass voice What a pleasant bite in my lobe Beckoned me We stood back to front 20 And peered at each other You chanced to be mine Was not predicted Though I balked at it Agglutinated we were ! Barisal Cadet College 27 February 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 30 April 2004 Effusive Feel You put you over the sleeping mine Placing your rosy cheek On my rough lips Rounding virgin twins On my harsh chest Coiling round my neck By your scintillating arms I was awaken from limited sleep Cool room became warm Pleasant exitement in soft lively warmth Spread out Two rhymes flowed in one stream With oodles of gratification I was caught by fancy by you Barisal Cadet College 01 March 2003 21 Water Makes Rock Of Ice Obnoxious attempts of bearish cruelty So vulgar Ouch ! so painful And lackorthodox idea is so rubbish Exertion sometimes becomes so painful Subordinates cannot bear And they are usually fenced in And cannot fence with It twists them round its finger And outfoxes Their faces are twisted with pains It is all up with them And they go to rack and ruin And try to cross thorny bush To pick up roses Erosion of reputation cannot be stopped But he forgets Mass of soft water makes rock of ice Barisal Cadet College 06 March 2003 22 Not This Alone To ruin the great work of mine It stains, trounce and pinch And I have not any trophy And my life turns to colourless black And white Age is reflected in my eyes Not this alone But I cannot change the bad days Into good And pleasantries are burnt Falling in plight of sunheat of frustration I am not exacting Feeling of snaky pleasure And I cannot read The torn pages of my life And I cannot keep my eyes dry I am bedevilled by misfortune And had been worst the day before The shadow of mouse is running Behind the narrow darkness And it begets misery Causing a horrific crash I walk on burning coal No wall is to prevent disaster And no fence is there It curls my hope And put the lamp off I have lost all sorts of suavity And my submerged feeling reach to none It is a description of colour to blind Barisal Cadet College 16 March 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 7 & 14 Nov 2003 23 Know More You told I do not know English Though you know more And I know a little You told it in a sacred place And you are a pious man And I am not so pious You speak the truth And you told in a secret place That I do not know English Though you are a pious man And I am not so pious Though you know more And I know a little Jhenidah 17 March 2003 In The Obscure Dark Lying beside me You became brightly dazzling Your lowered eyes with warm glow And quivering lips made pleasantry Lustre of your cheeks was reflected In your eyes Goody ! Pleasant feeling arose In your lustful glance And luscious lips You flushed crimson For a while we became hedonist Your maidenly shyness Blushed your glowing cheek We could stymie ourselves 24 Becoming warmly colourful Your pliable body as cane Bent down Remained in a world of fantasy We glued to each other On the quiet in a privet Gloss and glitter of your long hair Were shinning in the obscure dark Erotic emotion erupted And you exhaled warm I was exulted from your basked company That gave us a pleasure - buzz Remaining in a den When I was welcomed to your bonny bossom We were enraptured by our own company Mantilla slipped from your gloss-skinned shoulder I was completely enthralled At last we burst After only couple of minutes of setting our relation You closed to me with an amorous glance And minuet With thin appearance And fluttering hair with blazing fire Having moonface with milksmile Tearful eyes caused by emotional feeling Scented carees of lips on lustrous cheek Brimful heart with flooded love Inner waves rose high Softness of slick twins Was streaming softly Crossing my shape I tried to reach the total shape You were adorned with divine grace And ice was waiting to come out 25 I was enamoured by your delighted company We were thrown into ecstasies With unbounded blissful pleasure I could not subdue my mounting emotion You cordially engrossed me And enthused over me I was elated And effervesced too We sang the same unison Remaining abreast Your undulating gloss-hair Was swimming in the air At times lechery grew in ours Becoming jubilant and jovial And lust was reflected In your eyes We had no rheostat to control ourselves Though you were not my usual partner Rather stray Rhythmic breathing turned into music Barisal Cadet College 22 March 2003 Louring Look Of Cloud None is there to absolve me And nothing is happened aberant And myself is always ablaze Falling in an aghast abyss And miserable cauldron And I am attacked by catty attitude And miseries crop up And I footle helplessly Becoming a forlorn I cannot overcome the impasse And always lashed I am 26 Louring look of cloud Covers my feelings often Unabated storm prevails in my sky And angry cat leaps on me That has seemed deeper wounds I bear Barisal Cadet College 12 April 2003 Crawling Dark Day does not dance Night does not dance rather cry Huminity is sleeping And it is being burnt Let it be slept Let it be burnt Brown dark crawls onto it And covers all over Ethos is broken Civilization goes back And predicament prevails And it is galumphing crippling And unhinged Peace is crawling onto dark None is safe from the fire Blood is welling from earth None is there to fence it And save from the paws of unfeeling attitude No well - timed step is found And unjust deeds are being continued All efforts come unstuck And it is vanquished Let the huminity cry All the birds return back To its nests Where the humanity will return Wounded feelings cannot fly Dark crawls towards dream Broken wings of dream are crashed And cannot move Remaining in a blind cave Motionless and creepled 27 Sky becomes red Sea is black Trees turn into yellow It is difficult to remain unmoved Viewing this cruelty It is a prelude to the tolal breakdown Barisal Cadet College 14 April 2003 Narrow Bottle I am confined in a narrow bottle of favour Let me go to my own house Home of dream I cannot bear the scent of indignity In airless darkness Let tie be tightened Let the hearts be bloomed Like flowers Let everybody be loved Which is most powerful Is opportunity Barisal Cadet College 16 April 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 26 September 2003 Wrecked Mass Of Ice If desperate, boorish behavior deludes No way to escape And it is my destiny I give myself over to despair Becoming a wrecked mass of ice 28 How I shall bear far-reaching consequences My desolent existence is so painful I can not bear Nothing of mine is commended And misfortune is my constant companion No balm is available To take the sting out of the burn None is there to alleviate my pains When plunderer is still in action How my booty will be recovered Bore moves upward I am debased and defamed It is an outpouring of griefs Barisal Cadet College 23 April 2003 Clandestine Chuckle We went on an alfresco amatory trip That was clandestine We had an opportunity to enjoy A pleasurable journey in a pleasure-boat I was lying on your warm lap And you were plucking my grey hair We did not wait for pop And were overwhelmed by pleasure I was overly impressed By your placid temperament and pleasantry You always kept yourself spick and span Precious moments we passed Your basked company Was stimulus to feel more And I was gratified Rounding my neck by your lotus stalk arms You grasped my lobe I seemed lessbright by you 29 Communing together Our every sojourns were full of pleasures Being deshabille Putting my lips on your luscious cheek Gave us a buzz I was illused And your unopen mood started to open Closed window of your lips Started to open too And your honeyed euphonic voice uttered, I shall not let you leave When you were unveiled Tallowy belly and life - marked navel Worn-out and withered twins Were not seemed lucrative But they won full of wonder Wrung and wrenched Naughty fingers wringled On your smooth back You felt chilly And took shelter in my suit Combination of our alike tastes Clenched us together And we were chatting up confidentially We coloured our hearts green Your come-hither smile Inspired me to open your chignon Being a sedate you became girly-girly And breasted my chest softly Rose of your lips was wiped Kajol of your eyes was fade And we became bedraggled A beatific smile flourished your cheeks That beautified you more Barisal Cadet College 24 April 2003 * Published in Observer Magazine on 20 February 2004 30 Stones Are Embedded I cannot forget the enduring memories It was needed for me to be alone And it happened It was needed and expected But not predicted Now I can see me And feel too Sword of misfortune comes out And runs into my heart With onrush of my shaky thoughts I seclude myself from all sorts of normal living As stones are embedded in rock I always look fraught and frantic And am burnt to frazzle Cutting cold in a defrocked body Living a lily-livered living Barisal Cadet College 02 May 2003 Sorrowful Memory When I was sitting in a running bus You rode from a stopage And stood leaning against me Your glossy hair was swimming In the residual air And covered my face You were around twenty five And younger than my daughter 31 Affection I felt for you But could not help It is a sorrowful memory That cuts me often Ganraganj 19 May 2003 Frisson Of Delight I do not know if you keep our remembrance In the edge of your cute heart We used waiting to meet on and off While we gagged around We became gaga You always remained equable You lolled leaning against me And whispered in sotto voce voice, Please do not let me alone We indulged ourselves In our basked company When you were defrocked Attractive lumbar pits were exposed A frisky kiss you offered And roses of your fragrant lips were wiped In an almost inaudible whisper feelingly We reached fever pitch Your face was irradiated with pleasure Your skin was smooth to the feel You soon became sweet - tonned and elegant My heart became lamplit It went off without any hitch And sun was tired Barisal Cadet College 25 May 2003 32 Globules Drop Pit-a-Pat We were sitting hand to hand I put my lips on your dimpled cheek After you coil my neck By your lotus-stalked arms Leaning against my chest Your nascent virgin twins became stiff Downstream flowed in thousand kelometres We could not make up our minds And we dilly-dallied But at times sweet dream dipped into dike A cross current swim we swam And a dimenuendu song we sang Globules were dropping pit-a-pat From the candle At times you became goody-goody And could not hide your glee of delight And a piquant pleasure it was Barisal Cadet College 04 July 2003 Manna From Heaven A quickie sloppy kiss we kissed When you remained in squatting position Sweet dream and unification were dipped into dike And flowed at mach two Lascivious feeling came out In a sotto voce whisper Lapping waves moved downward That amused us greatly And a singsong song we sang 33 And you were whispering In a singsong voice And a soapy swim we swam In son et lumiere We were engaged to hobnob In hobly-horse And it was an impromtu Manna from Heaven Barisal Cadet College 06 July 2003 Sinking Spree I was besotted with you Like Billy-oh Being a petite My tongue became squeegee You laid your dress open like petals A desperate craving of love Developed in ours I was fascinated while you pouted And crouched over me Your nascent virgin twins Were squeezed within my palm Nestling in your honeyed lap In a lilac You offered a saccharin smile I went on a sinking spree Barisal Cadet College 12 July 2003 34 Heady Feelings I being an old flame in the olden days And you being a late teens Went on a promenade And had had a swashbuckling trip swimmingly Your symmetry winsome, taciturn ladylike manner Clemency of your sweet sotto voce voice Svelte shape and wistful glance fascinated me None could be replica of you You tapped my back Your arms coiled round my neck As a collar And you swang Your cheek became aflame And lips adorous In a cloak of dark In a closet It was a sybaritic temptation And we clung together Fingers fumbled with your buttons Softness and warmth of nascent virgin twins Were fondled fondly Telltale smell of your breath tempted Lascivious feeling came out In a sotto voce humming And we were attacked by heady feelings Still we could refrain ourselves From nooky Remaining in a celestial abode Love is not periodic fever Rather lasts for ever Barisal Cadet College 26 August 2003 35 Mr. Mahboob-Ul-Alam, Principal, Rangpur Cadet College, was born in 1946 in Shailkupa Upazilla under Jessore district of East Bengal. He was graduated and post-graduated from Rajshahi University. He also obtained Bachelor of Education degree under the same university. His books of poems titled Hidden Breath, A Magical Living On Sharp Sword & Nvmdz‡j Kjfvl are published. This is his fourth collection of poems.
Posted on: Tue, 11 Mar 2014 04:29:41 +0000
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