Love Letter to My Future Mate, Companion, Partner, and Lover This is a hard time for me right now. But, I know you’re out there ready to become my best friend. I could use it right now. I miss companionship. It used to be my full-time job that gave me the most job satisfaction I’ve ever had in life. Now, my partner has temporarily slipped away into another realm doing wonderfully magnificent work as an emissary for our Lord, Savior, and God Jesus Christ, spreading His influence and His Gospel to those who have died ill-prepared to meet their Heavenly Father. I don’t know for sure who you are, but there are some things I know about you already and things I’m pretty sure about. There are things I believe will happen between you and me. We’re going to be an awesome, dynamite, powerhouse of a team! I just believe it with all my heart! But, let me be a little more reverent for a moment instead of ecstatically enthusiastic. At first, when the Lord interrupted my grieving recently and gave me hard things to bear, letting me know so soon that He wants me to start the process now and eventually remarry and become a father, I thought to myself that that must mean any wife would do so long as we end up having children either naturally or by adoption or foster care. I was okay with the possibility of not even being on the same page as you spiritually and religiously. I love to share the Gospel and so, I thought, maybe I could feel a sense of purpose and meaning in gently showing you my faith and, if the time was ever right, inviting you to adopt it as your own, too. But, since then, I’ve changed my mind. I think that in order for us to raise our children in the way I’d like that you and I most definitely need to be highly compatible in our faith in and dedication to our dearest Friend and Family Member and Master: Jesus Christ our atoning Savior and Protecting Teacher. This is a critical desire and hope of mine. Ideally, I want you to be His missionary in your heart and actions. I’m hoping you’ve already been sincerely at work in spreading His love, His truth, and His beauty to anyone and everyone that you have an opportunity to do so with. And I hope that you won’t wait for the opportunity to arise. I trust that you’re eagerly engaged in the good cause of creating opportunities to introduce people to your current and loving companion, Jesus Christ, one way or another. I’m wishing that you are close to the Holy Ghost and following His promptings because I know that if you are, then you’ll be infected with a yearning desire to share Christ with the world. This is similarly a very important wish of mine. A humble desire of mine is that you will love my heart. That you’ll trust my intentions. That you’ll appreciate me for what I do in my efforts to spread His truth, love, and beauty with the world through my personal interactions with others, through my profession, and through my church service to the saints and sinners alike. Ideally, you’re enthusiastic about life, optimistic, encouraging, and cheerful—a girl in whose presence I’ll feel a desire to achieve, who will inspire me to do my best, and to make the most of myself. This is important to me. Very. My tender wish for you is that you’re soft, gentle, sweet, graceful, tender, and feminine. Even if you don’t particularly feel those ways, it doesn’t matter so much as long as you’re those ways from my perception of you. And, most likely, when I fall in love with you, you’ll appear those ways to me. But, I’m committed to seeing you for who you are and not delude myself into thinking you’re someone you’re not. Just know, these are attributes I’m looking for that will help me easily spot and recognize you. I have a very sensitive Wife-O-Meter. I’m confident that I’ll recognize you before you recognize me. But, if you spot me first, it will tickle me pink beyond any expectation I have. The reason is because I don’t expect a lot from you, that is, I don’t feel entitled to certain aspects about you. But, what I do have are hopes for certain aspects about you. If my dreams aren’t realized, don’t worry, I won’t be disappointed. Disappointment only comes to me if expectations and entitlements aren’t fulfilled. I rarely let myself go that far in my hopes and dreams. It’s not in my nature to be so demanding. And so, I’m a very happy person. “Come what may and love it” is an attitude that comes naturally to me because I don’t expect an easy life. I don’t feel entitled to peace, serenity, and ease. In fact, I invite challenges and heartache. I look them square in the eye and tell them, “There’s nothing you can throw at me that I won’t find virtue in somehow. I’ll take whatever you present me with, find the good in it, and cherish it with pure sincerity.” It’s not a deception, either. I’m not tricking myself. I have eyes that can perceive goodness, truth, love, and beauty in almost every situation in their varying degrees. Theyre there. Rarely is anything pure evil. I see God’s influence when others only concentrate on whatever degree of evil there may be mixed in with the lot of it all. I prize the good and I emphasize it so that others can see what I see and know what I know and then magnify the good thats there into something better or best. I’m also desiring with a mild desire that you’re a person who loves heavenly music, perhaps even possessing a better than average capability in expressing it and/or you’re a person of academia, who treasures not only faith, but also knowledge and learning. I truly hope that you’re sincerely interested in your future responsibilities as a wife and mother. We’re going to have a wonderful family life together. Our children are going to bring us joy. We’re going to raise them to seek for and try to develop faith in Jesus Christ. We’re going to encourage them to want to live the higher law of keeping all His Sabbath days holy. I can’t do that without your support, though. I need you as my good companion. We’ll work together on these things and love this intimate association with each other. Please don’t be concerned about your physical appearance. I can promise you that I’m going to find you physically attractive no matter what your height, weight, and shape is. I can see more than physical looks. I can see the beauty of your soul. And, as a domino effect, I will fall in love with the temple that adorns your gorgeous spirit and feminine personality. Another mild desire, but certainly not critical, is that when we marry, we’ll be uniting our families together who have shared values, preferably values found in and taught by Jesus Christ’s very own church organization. Priesthood values. Young Women and Relief Society values. I love all of those, even if theyre not explicitly accepted by some of our family members, but implicitly they still live them to a degree. Remember, I can see the virtues that they dont recognize are coming from Christ. I see their closeness to Him better than they can. And I cant wait for the day when they recognize Him and find out theyre more similar to Him and some of His ways than they ever thought. I also hope that we’ll have compatible birth order roles. I hope you’ll let me cuddle you, be physically affectionate, spend lots of quality time with you, do exciting projects together, and, during it all, be more like a big brother or twin to you than a little brother or parental figure. I don’t want to be or act those ways to you because they’re not natural to me. You probably won’t like me if I’m not myself or being natural. Because my love language is so focused on deep, meaningful, verbal communication, I mildly hope that you’ll speak my native tongue well, love conversations with me and also with others, and have a similar cultural upbringing as me. These aren’t critical, but they are things I’d like to enjoy with you that you’ll appreciate as much as I do. That’s not to say we won’t dabble in other languages and thoroughly love other cultures. It’s just to share an ideal I have. Finally, I hope that you or others won’t criticize me for being so open and quick to begin the process of looking for my next spouse and wanting to first become best friends with her. But if you do, I can take it. You need to know, though, I don’t do this lightly and it’s not something I originally thought of doing. The Lord’s been at work. I know fairly well what He wants for me right now. It’s hard and not easy for me. I’m uncomfortable detaching my actions of devotion toward my former wife and lover, Jamie Diane Gibson Hartley (former from the secular sense, not actual sense). My heart will always be with her and I’ll always know she is an eternal companion of mine. I don’t know exactly how the Lord’s plan works in heaven, but you can be assured that I’m looking for a temple marriage with you that will seal us as eternal companions, too. I will love you with a love unique for you. I hope I never make you feel any less loved than I loved (and still love) Jamie. Our love will have a different flavor—perhaps peach instead of strawberry—but it will be intensely sweet, and pure, and wonderful.
Posted on: Sat, 09 Aug 2014 07:54:42 +0000
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