My latest blog post from my authors website petedavidbooks Medical Studies will be the Death of me Recently I thought I had received some bad news from the medical community as I sat reading the latest health study by researchers from the Harvard Medical School. The study reported a strong correlation between severe male pattern baldness and death by heart disease, possibly due to higher levels of testosterone. Having lost my father to heart disease, I raced to the bathroom and confirmed in the mirror that my full head of hair had indeed succumbed to a severe case of the hair loss pattern. This research news was not welcome. I continued reading the gory details of the study and felt my blood pressure soar and the LDL coagulate in my arteries. I started my bucket list after chewing a clove of garlic, and popping several Omega-3 capsules washed down with two large glasses of red wine. Until reading that study, I had felt healthy, keeping in good shape through regular exercise. I assumed that the daily dose of blood pressure medication was thwarting my genetic disposition. In fact, those pills worked so well that on certain days my blood pressure plummets, creating a head rush that threatens to drop me head first to the ground and crack my head open. Further reading of the study made my chest tighten like those people with COPD that were in so much discomfort they didn’t notice that elephant maneuvering itself onto their chests. Did I need to call my doctor to see if a prescription of Spiriva was right for me? I now regretted not getting that hair transplant or investing in a lifetime supply of Rogaine. But then again, Mother Nature was tough to fool, and with the way humans were treating the earth, she wasn’t likely to be in a good mood and cut me any slack. Fortunately, I read to the study’s dramatic conclusion and breathed a sigh of relief. The medical link only applied to men younger than 55. My 55th birthday had just passed and I hadn’t had a heart attack. I could relax knowing that as of June my risk for heart disease would be no greater than a younger man with a full head of Led Zeppelin-era Robert Plant-like locks. Just as I was celebrating my good fortune, the medical community released another report that appeared as a pop-up article on the MSN website. The title inferred a link between a man’s height and chronic disease. My cursor hovered with uncertainty over the highlighted link. Did I want to test my fate? Better to find out sooner than later. I clicked and set about reading the report. Hallelujah! Short people lived longer and had delayed onset of chronic disease. Suddenly, for the first time in my life being less than average height had a distinct advantage. Thank goodness I wasn’t a tall, 30-year old male with a full head of hair. I stopped working on my bucket list, but pinned it to the bulletin board right above my desk. The next important medical study is due for release any day now. The anxiety is killing me.
Posted on: Tue, 29 Oct 2013 16:47:51 +0000
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