My life as far back as I can recall, to when innocence was lost, disillusionment dissolved, naivety melted away, my life has been a war. The darkness, it was oppressive. I was smothering, and it so perverted my mind that I actually hoped it overwhelmed me. So many things happened, some not significant to anyone but me, but they provided hope. A speck of light here, a flash of it there. Then I noticed a pattern. The light, it’s origin was God. No matter how far I sank into the deep vastness of darkness, always, any height I gained wasn’t (I now realize) me. It isn’t. I was broken. I was bad, I was determined to do it on my own, or lose the battle trying. But anytime I dug myself out a little bit, I traced the ground gained to God. Every time. Now? Now I have decided to surrender. “He will direct your paths” is something I’ve always heard, but never allowed myself to consent to believing. I grudgingly gave the reigns over, now He reigns, sovereign. It was Him, always. I was saved, rescued, redeemed, by Him, by His works, by His love, and for His glory. He is so powerful, and so gracious, and so good. He is Goodness. I tried to reassemble the broken pieces of my life, but was left with cuts on the jagged edges, now I am seamless, not just reassembled, but restored, by Him. Let go, let go of the brokenness, the darkness, the pain, the sorrow, why carry it? Tell me. Why? Why burden yourself when He is willing and able, and wants to. He wants the best for you, you are beautiful, you are His, His creation, and you are fearfully and wonderfully made in His image. He doesn’t want you to work for His love, to earn it, to prove your righteousness, you worth. He wants you as you are, alone, afraid, broken, desperate, a mess, He will change that. He will change you. I am evidence of that. He wants your love, and for you to rejoice in Him.
Posted on: Mon, 09 Sep 2013 06:16:45 +0000
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