#NUTSHELL – OCTOBER 17th — COUPLES CONNECTION – Proverbs 6:16-19: Are there times in our marriage when we think openness and honesty may do more harm than good? Aren’t there times when it is more loving to lie (just a little) than to speak the truth? After all it will avoid unpleasantness. If you can avoid hurting your spouse; but does lying really avoid unpleasantness? When a person lies to avoid unpleasantness you should be brutally honest with your motivation. Are you really afraid of hurting your spouse? Or is it yourself that you’re worried about? The temptation to lie comes when we are confronted with something that we have done. We are tempted to alter the truth or rationalize the facts in order to deflect the blame away from ourselves. Many times this pattern begins when we are children because it is so difficult to say “Yes, I did it. I’m sorry.” Have you noticed the reactions of your spouse when you accept responsibility for your actions and are open and truthful about them? Tell the truth scripture says, “To speak the truth in love.” “Let the buck stop with you.” Just stand back and watch your spouse be amazed if not shocked! Let’s dive into a few conclusions about open communication: Look at the positive aspects of openness (don’t hide from your spouse) – Honey, you have the right to know me so, let me tell you about myself. – Being open to our mate is not a license to attack them, “Yes this is what I did, but the reason I did it was that you mistreated me.” This is an attack not pure honesty. – When we have made a mistake admit it. Let us be honest about ourselves without excuses or justifications. In an open and honest relational atmosphere both partners are free to share what they feel, think and believe. As a husband or wife do not erect barriers that will hinder open and honest conversation.
Posted on: Fri, 17 Oct 2014 11:01:43 +0000
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