Okay- so Im torn. On the one hand, -in the overall scheme of geological/cosmological time, I realize that I am essentially, nothing. A mere dust-speck floating in an ocean of turbulent change. So basically, I dont really matter, and thus, I shouldnt take my life (or even my death) so terribly seriously- so I should maybe just chill and not stress over, well really, anything... On the other hand, -because I am so insignificant, so temporary, a notch above nothing, and there will only ever be the ONE of me... and I (probably) only get this ONE LIFE to do whatever it is Im going to do in the meager time allotted, I feel inclined to take this (little) life very VERY seriously, for fear of wasting it. I want to DO SOMETHING WORTHWHILE with my teensy little life, even if its something that will really only matter to the people left behind when Im gone, or the people yet to come- From this perspective, this life DOES matter- The laws of supply and demand apply, as there is a limited supply of life to be had, and the demand is rather high. I mean generally speaking, no one WANTS to die.* So, I want to live my life with my eyes and mind wide open, to make the very most of every precious moment as best I can, to have fun and rewarding experiences, to show some ambition, maybe in the end, even have something to show that will endure, like my music- but at the same time It would also behoove me to be prepared for this whole ride to come to an abrupt pointless end. So, does it all matter? Is this serious? Is anything really crucial? Or, does nothing really matter in the end and should I just surrender to the ultimate futility of it all? I must say I envy people who can let it all go and never really allow themselves to be bothered my these existential questions- but I also admire people who manage to make something of themselves in the short lives theyve had- People who make you say, Now that was a life well lived! The problem is both views are valid (and there may be other views I havent even considered). *Okay, some people DO want to die- In fact some even succeed at bringing about their own deaths- but lets just say that generally speaking, no one wants to die. Even suicidal people would prefer to have their problems solved and to get on with living. Thoughts? Questions? Comments? Words of praise? Helpful hints?
Posted on: Sun, 26 Oct 2014 20:34:32 +0000
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