Okay so heres a bit of my story. This might be pretty detailed. I was in Grade 7, I think that makes me 13 at the time. I had this friend, lets call her Zee, she was already cutting herself, and I was having problems at home with my mom. I had also recently started thinking about my sister, she died before she was born but she would have been my only blood sister(I still love my other half-blood sister!:D) so I was struggling with that as well and how my parents never talked about her or celebrated her memory on her birthday. Zee showed me what she did in a bathroom cubicle at school, it was nothing major at the time, she used a pencil sharpeners blade and made small cuts on her ankle and I was like but why do you do that? I wasnt much of a sucker for pain so that didnt bother me too much. She told me that it made things feel better, because she had problems at home too. So I was like okay cool maybe this will work for me too! I wasnt very streetwise at that time of my life so I used the same blade she used(luckily nothing happened with that) and I made a small X on my foot. I dont know if it was all in the mind but I swear it did make me feel better, it hurt like hell because there isnt much underneath the skin on the inside of your foot. So yeah it really hurt, but it just felt so good, so I did the X over a few more times. After that day I cut myself at least 3 times a week, my problems never seemed to get any less. I was still making minor cuts, mostly on my foot where it could be hidden by my sock. Needless to say it escalated, but Ill continue on another day. But please, Im sharing my story to encourage others to feel comfortable sharing theirs, this is NOT to motivate you to try it or or continue doing it. Its not healthy and there are so many better ways of handling anger, hurt and loneliness. So if you ever feel you have no one to talk to, please feel free to talk to me, because I really have been there..
Posted on: Fri, 07 Mar 2014 08:40:39 +0000
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