Please excuse my rant, I just need to get this all out there for the handful of lovely people who actually read my posts. But I guess this is when I come to terms with the fact that Ive lost everything. People have been asking me to elaborate on this, and I just havent had the strength to detail it. Well, here you are. I lost my job. We lost our house. I lost my best friend, and I lost my fiancee.. (I hope theyre happy together). I lost my cats, My apartment, Furniture and other things from my Grandma Chernish, And keepsakes from my Grandma Swords, Both of whom have passed on. I lost everything I owned aside from my clothes, makeup and a few movies. My old friends have all given up on dealing with my emotions and confusion over the situation. All the friends Ive made in the past month dissapear after a while, Sometimes its days, sometimes its weeks, but they always go away. I think I prefer it when they leave sooner rather than later. Im fortunate to have a place to rest my head at night, but I cant help but regret once again becoming my parents burden. I wake up in a bad mood morning after morning, I cant stop the nightmares that constantly wake me. I have a reoccurring dream where a man comes to my door, gives me a hug and says Lets go home baby, youll be okay. but the second I go out the door, everything morphs into some gruesome nightmare and I wake up. I have yet to figure out who this man is I keep dreaming of..... Anyways, thats that. I could probably go on forever, but I think Ive written enough (or too much). Maybe one day Ill be able to put this all behind me. Im trying.
Posted on: Tue, 13 Jan 2015 18:36:17 +0000
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