#RELATIONSHIPS_ARE_NOT_EASY_AND_NEVER_WILL_BE. Thats the reality. The sooner you understand that,the better. Beloved, relationships are work. The false idea that a relationship is meant to be magical and devoid of problems will be the death of you if you don’t change your mindset. In your relationship (even with the most mature person) you will have to confront times of jealousy, insecurity, doubt, pet-peeves, anger, frustration, disrespect, no romantic spark etc. The relationship gets cemented when you work through these issues, apologise for hurting each other and resolve them with humility (not proving that you were right). However, if you give up too quickly, you end up garnering more baggage and operating in fear because you believe that good relationships are trouble-free. Beloved, as our marital counsellors would say, “Conflict isn’t what destroys relationships; it is unresolved conflict that does.” Abandoning ship because you felt disrespected is simply procrastinating the battle you need to face. As long as you date a descendant of Adam and Eve, they will sin and they will offend you at some point in your relationship. Men and women walking with God who get into serious relationships need to be patient with each other during difficult times. Often I have heard of two well-meaning people who lose a good relationship at the first sign of trouble. When the mushy feeling disappeared, when one ate with their fingers instead of using a fork, when one said something shady etc. Many of these things are simple flaws yet you find born again men and women abandoning ship. If he mismatched his shoes and shirt, if she burped in public, if he farted loudly or if she was late for a date, please extend grace. It could be a one-time mistake and not necessarily a habit. You could be missing out on a potential husband/ wife who can actually change some of these minor flaws. If we don’t end the trend of giving up quickly on relationships, we end up creating a bigger problem. It’s this: I believe that the multiple jumping from relationship to relationship among believers is practising for divorce; we are sharpening the axe of dissatisfaction that we may easily wield in the battlefield of marriage.
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 10:02:09 +0000
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