THE CHALLENGE OF SELF-LOVE: Loving, kindness and Forgiveness meditations are some of the most neurologically powerful practices weve documented in our brain scan studies. But for people who are highly anxious, its often difficult to send love to themselves. My neurocoaching strategies often include having clients dialogue with the self-critical voice that says Im not worth loving. You literally interview your own negativity as you mindfully explore how this subpersonality thinks. However, its important to realize that this negative speech is a nothing more than an imaginary projection on ones self - a creative fantasy that other parts of the brain emotionally react to. Many brainscan studies show that affirmations and the repetition of positive value words lowers activity in those parts of the brain that generate worrisome thoughts. Accomplishment boards and gratitude lists have also been shown to be effective in undermining self-doubt and rebuilding self-esteem. But for someone who has a long history of anxiety, it demands a life-time commitment to constantly practice positivity, especially when one feels worthless or depressed. Research continues to show that we are genetically prone to be either optimistic or pessimistic, but that we can retrain the brain to become more positive. Acceptance is another important tool to add. As the Serenity Prayer suggests: to change what we know we can change, to accept what we know we cannot change, and to know the difference between the two. When we do this, it becomes easier to immerse ourselves in the dozens of daily pleasures and successes that every day brings. - Mark Waldman, Praxis Now Neuro Coach
Posted on: Fri, 18 Apr 2014 13:00:01 +0000
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