The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from Miffed to Peeved. Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to Irritated or even A Bit Cross. Brits have not been A Bit Cross since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from Tiresome to a Bloody Nuisance. The last time the British issued a Bloody Nuisance warning level was during the great fire of 1666. The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide. The only two higher levels in France are Collaborate and Surrender. The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed Frances white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the countrys military capability Its not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from Shout loudly and excitedly to Elaborate Military Posturing. Two more levels remain: Ineffective Combat Operations and Change Sides.. The Germans also increased their alert state from Disdainful Arrogance to Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs. They also have two higher levels: Invade a Neighbour and Lose. Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels. The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. Americans meanwhile are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of their allies, just in case.
Posted on: Thu, 31 Jul 2014 15:11:41 +0000
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