The Immortal Beloved, Beethoven 1 July 6 In the morning- My angel, my all my self - only a few words today, and indeed with pencil (with yours) only tomorrow is my lodging positively fixed what a worthless waste of time on such - why this deep grief, where necessity speaks - can our love exist but by sacrifices by not demanding everything can you change it, that you not completely mine. I am not completely yours - Oh God 2 look upon beautiful nature and calm your soul over what must be - love demands everything and completely with good reason. so it is for me with you, for you with me - only you forget so easily, that I must live for myself and for you, were we wholly united, you would feel this painfulness just as little as I - my trip was frightful. I arrived here only at 4 oclock yesterday morning. because they lacked horses, the postal service chose another route but what a 3 horrible way, at the next to the last station they warned me about traveling at night, made me afraid of a forest, but this only provoked me - and I was mistaken, the coach had to break down on the terrible route, a mere bottomless country road [crossed out: and the] without 2 such postil- lions as I had, I would have been stranded on the way Esterhazy on the other customary route here had the same fate with 8 horses, as I with four - still I had some pleasure again. 4 as always, whenever I fortunately survive something - now quickly to interior from exterior. we will probably see each other soon. even today I cannot convey to you observances, which I made during these few days about my life - were our hearts always close together, I would of course make none of the sort my heart is full of much to tell you - Oh - there are still moments when I find that speech is nothing at all - cheer up - remain my faithful only treasure, my all, as I for you the rest the gods must send what must and should be for us -- your faithful ludwig - 5 Monday evening on July 6 - You are suffering you my dearest creature - just now I notice that letters must be posted very early in the morning. Mondays - Thursdays - the only days on which the mail goes from here to K - you are suffering -Oh, wherever I am, you are with me. I say to myself and to you, arrange that I can live with you. what a life!!!! as it is!!!! without you - Persecuted by the kindness of people here and there, which I think - I want to deserve just as little as I deserve it - Humility of man to man - it pains me - and when I regard myself 6 in the framewoek of the universe what am I and what is he - whom one calls the Greatest - and yet - herein is again the divine spark of man - I weep when I think that you will probably not receive the first news of me until Saturday - as much as you love me - I love you even more deeply but - but never hide yourself from 7 me - good night - as one bathing I must go to sleep [struck out: o go with] [struck out: go with --] so near! so far! is not our love a true heavenly edifice - but also firm, like the firmament - good morning on July 7 - while still in bed thoughts thrust themselves toward you my eternally beloved now and then happy then again sad. awaiting fate. if it will grant us a favorable hearing - I can only live either wholly with you or not at all. 8 yes I have resolved to stray about in the distance, until I can fly into your arms and call myself entirely at home with you. can send my soul embraced by you into the realm of spirits - yes unfortunately it must be - you will compose yourself all the more since you know my faithfulness to you, never can another own my heart, never - never - O God why have to separate oneself, what one loves so, and yet my life in V [ienna] as it is now is a miserable life - Your love makes me the most happy and the most unhappy at once - at my age I would need some conformity regularity of life - can 9 this exist in our relationship? -- Angel, right now I hear that the mail goes every day - and I must therefore close, so that you will receive the L [etter] immediately - be calm, only through quiet contemplation of our existence can we reach our goal to live together - be patient -love me - today - yesterday - What longing with tears for you - you - you my 10 love - my all - fare- well - o continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved L forever yours forever mine forever us
Posted on: Thu, 09 Oct 2014 06:56:22 +0000
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