This just in. The Winter Olympics: Extended - TopicsExpress

This just in. The Winter Olympics: Extended Edition. Yesterday, the American James W. Falcon posted a record breaking performance! James, who chose to wear a suit, tie, and an old pair of Champion running sneakers instead of the traditional Winter Olympic attire and competition number, qualified for a second heat in the combined cross country-ice skating round as he sprinted from his house to the shuttle stop in newly fallen snow and ice. Pursued by a number of reporters, James sought refuge in a local Chinese Food Joint and celebrated his performance with several boxes of $1 Yak (with pepper & onions). When asked by a bystander what he felt contributed most to his performance, James is reported to have said, when you have more than 1 mouth to feed, you just have to.....make it do what it do Baby. More on this story at 6pm. This is Ray-Ray, Pookie and Nem. reporting live, Roundna Way News.

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