What I wish I had told my dearest uncle before he committed suicide: There is always a point in our lives when we feel like we have had enough! It seems like everything we touch goes wrong, all prayers are in vain, our dreams are just mere unrealistic wishes and our efforts amount to nothing. Times when we feel like it would be better if we were dead as life is just 1 never ending struggle. In my short years of life through my life experiences, I have learnt that my mom has always been right when she says MATHATA GA A TELE GO NNA. (Troubles are not permanent residents). 1. I learnt that death does not solve anything, but it does steal our opportunity of overcoming our challenges. 2. You are not alone. We all have our own challenges. Whether you are rich, poor, an orphan, widowed, single parent, a refugee, unemployed, schooling, even the people we perceive to be successful and happy have challenges they face. But we should always bear in mind that THIS MOMENT TOO WILL PASS. 3. Talk to someone. It helps! Sometimes we get depressed and lose hope by bottling in things, keeping them to ourselves and that weighs us down and weakens us. If you worry that people around you may spread around your issues, talk to a stranger! I have had conversations with strangers at the airport, in a line, at the bus stop, it helps! The idea is to get it off your chest. After that you walk away with all those emotions poured out. Its very good therapy talking to someone. Sometimes when you talk to someone and they tell you their story too, you get comfort in knowing that someone else has much bigger problems than yours. You may also get ideas on how to resolve your problems. 4. Optimism. No matter how hard it is, try to look for the positives. Try to look for that light at the end of the tunnel. This will not only help you move out of panic mode, but it will also give you hope that things will get better. 5. Dont label yourself a failure! When you walk around the street, no one knows your story, no one knows your troubles and infact, everyone is focusing on resolving their own issues! Do not think people are judging and criticizing you. No matter how bad things are, wash up, dress well and show up! 6. Try not to be alone for too long and if you have company, try to make sure they are people who motivate and build you. No negative vibes needed! 7. Accept that you are facing adversity. Some things happen that are beyond our control, its important to accept that although we want certain things to go a certain way, some of them we dont have control over. (For example, when your partner walks out of your life. It is hurtful, but you cannot force another person to stay with you. Another example, being retrenched from work.) 1 of my favourite prayers is the Serenity Prayer: Lord help me accept the things I cannot change and the strength to change the ones within my control and the Serenity to know the difference. 8. Admit that you need help and go seek the kind of help you need. 9. Consider how your death would affect those who care and love you. You will be robbing your children of a parent, shattering your parents hearts, leaving your friends and families with questions and regrets. Can you bear the responsibility of leaving so many lives broken? 10. Most importantly PRAY. I have an english pocket Bible always with me and on the 1st page, it has a list of different emotions linked to scriptures that will be helpful with dealing with a particular emotion at that time. I find that really enriching because I always go to the right scriptures that I need at that particular time. No problem is bigger than God!
Posted on: Sat, 02 Aug 2014 10:56:08 +0000
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