What a damn day!! For real. First it started okay. But I let someones bad mood affect me and for that I apologize. But I was really excited going in today and the bad mood just took the wind out of my sails. However, despite my last post, I did actually do what I had planned. I kept thinking about my negative stuff I kept telling myself and I know: whatever I keep thinking Im going to believe. And I need to stop that negativity, so I decided, in the 11th hour, to do what I had planned so I did. I will tell you guys after the outcome. I dont want to jinx myself or the situation. But do know that I went out against my insecurity and did something way outside my comfort zone. So, please keep fingers crossed. Second....the more bad news. I found out from a friend, a good friend, that our mutual friend attempted suicide. He didnt succeed but hes not any better than when he first attempted and he keeps talking about finishing so, hes in hospital care. I am announcing this because I know a lot of you pray and until today, I did a few times. After today, Im going to do a lot more. I will admit that I am truly shocked he did this. Ive never seen him have a bad day. But, they all say its usually the people who are always happy or make others feel good that are the ones who are unhappy themselves. And when my friend was telling me the story, he himself was crying which made me cry a little. My heart is so heavy. Its hitting a little closer than I ever imagined. Id really like to go see him but right now its not allowed. Hes under very strict visitor hour schedules and Im not sure yet what I want to say to him. For once Im at a loss for words. I keep thinking that maybe I should have gotten off my lazy ass and gone to see him when hes texted me for a dinner date. Twice its happened. And Ive been busy. Being lazy. And now hes in a hospital wanting to end his life!! Im hoping I will wake up and its a dream. :( Okay....Im done. I thank you for reading and praying for my friend. He really is a good friend and I need him around a little longer. Him and our other friends need him. Thank you all :)
Posted on: Mon, 08 Sep 2014 23:06:30 +0000
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