With the Christmas season approaching, I cant help but feel this year will be laced with sadness. This summer, our tiny beautiful baby, still so young and growing inside me, was unable to develop and we lost our child. My intention was never to share our turmoil, only to attempt to overcome, in hopes that one day we would feel whole again. Ive since changed my mind. Ive decided to write down my thoughts for 2 reasons: I feel God has encouraged me to speak and with 1 in 4 pregnancies resulting in a miscarriage, there are many out there who have, are or will face this heartbreaking ordeal. God has granted me peace during this time and a voice to share my experience with others. My amazing pastor has brought me to tears week after week on Sundays mornings with messages of hope and provision from God. I have suffered emotionally and physically from the loss of our baby. Although the baby was so young and potentially never developed a heartbeat, those few weeks of pregnancy changed our world forever; our baby was very alive to us. I will not attempt to encourage or promise that in time, the pain diminishes. Thats a brash idea. Even I am still trying to overcome the envy of those expecting around me while dealing with the realty that in February, we will not welcome a baby into our family. Simply put: Miscarriages suck. Period. But through his experience, I have found refuge in my faith. God taught me to loosen control on my life, regardless of the fact I had paint colors picked out for a babies room and a Fathers Day gift already purchased for the daddy-to-be, my life is in the Fathers hands and His will be done. Furthermore, my God is my provider. He is always renewing me and is my only source of strength. Gratitude to my familys support and husbands unconditional love but I still spent a great deal of time battling loss, emptiness and the enemy. I wore a scar so large I remained surprised the world didnt notice. God sees me without blemish and my heavy chains fall away. God is my Shephard, I shall not want. Quoting Pastor Steve, what I have in my Shephard is greater than what I dont have in my life. My joy is in Jesus and my inheritance is in Heaven. If there is one thing I would like to share with those dealing with the loss of an unborn child, its that God is waiting, arms open to hold you. Take a moment to meet with the Father. He knows heartbreak like no other. Let Him carry your burdens and pain, youve been strong for too long. The engraved bracelet I wear around my wrist every day so accurate states I carried you ever moment of your life and I will love you every moment of mine. We love you little baby McDonough. Daddy and mommy are so sad we didnt get to meet you.
Posted on: Mon, 17 Nov 2014 01:47:53 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015