Word Power # 55 Did You Settle? I was talking to someone just the other day about relationships. I saw him with someone I assumed was his partner and I asked how things were going. He informed me that the relationship did not work out but he has settled for a special arrangement. He sounded very positive and as if he had everything under control. Initially, he painted a colourful picture showcasing his content with the special arrangement and it was now his new normal After a deeper conversation he opened up to me that he wanted more in a relationship but had to settle. He felt he was never going to meet a partner who wanted the same things he did so he thought it best to settle for a special arrangement. What are you doing with your life that has become a special arrangement? Did you settle and forget to be all that you can be? Did you settle and gave up on those big dreams? Did you settle and accept less than you wanted for yourself? I have seen jobs I wanted to apply for but refused since I have applied to so many and did not even get an interview. Those moments pushed me to think I need to settle for something less than I desire. I have a job that pays well and I am happy to do what I do - but that is not my dream. Do I now settle out of fear of trying, do I settle because of all the past disappointments, do I settle because I know it is hard for a black man to get to certain levels in a country like ours, do I settle and do just what others expect me to do and be? Do I settle? Do I settle? Do I settle? We settle because we fear we do not have it in us to go the distance We settle because we fear what others will say if we seem to be too ambitious We settle because we fear what others will think of us We settle because others told us NO - we can’t go further, we can’t get more We settle because we fear this door may close soon We settle because we are getting older and we dont wish to be alone We settle because we fear if we ask for more we will lose those we have We settle because we start to believe the narrative in our minds that we are less than and don’t deserve more I have no issue with someone who settles - just ensure that what you settled for is exactly what you want. If not then your smile and confession of happiness will all be a farce. Dr. ABC
Posted on: Wed, 24 Sep 2014 21:09:16 +0000
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