Write up by Maheen Wickramasinge It has been a really rough ride these past few months and I’m sad to say that as much as I try to make it better, it keeps getting worse. Anger, is not a good thing. Now, I have had anger before in the past, but never this bad until I came here to Sri Lanka. The angger has boiled up so much these past few months after what one of my parents did, threatening me and especially, doing mean things to me like lying and putting me in nasty hospitals. It has been a vicious cycle, and I literally get the shivers thinking it’s going to get worse. My own mother is such a threat to me. I so badly want to move out of this country as the anger will only increase. Anger, has not been good with me at all. Sri Lankans are big threats, and I mean, big, big threats, except my father. My ego has really been damaged in Sri Lanka. Anger, is very dangerous, and it is very unhealthy. I can’t understand it at all why my life continues to be full of anger in an unhappy country. It is horrible for me and only makes me sicker and could very well increase your high blood pressure. So much harm has been done in SL that the anger gets to the point out of control. I really, really want to move out, and I know it will happen. I know something good will soon be happening. I have a mental condition, depression, anxiety and all, and the anger making me doing ridiculous uncalled for things without realizing, makes the anxiety and depression so bad. SL is a big, huge no no to me. I don’t want to have this anger in me. No. I want good things to happen, happy happy things in my life to happen, but not in SL. Lots of people here in SL have abused me and not treated me well, and the anger got so out of wack and still is getting out of wack living in SL. Doctors baby me, they inject me, etc. When I go to an assisted living care home in Canada, that will just be an enormous life saver, and I will be full of happiness and joy. I can’t wait! The anger gets bad when, say for example at the hospital in SL, there is no land phone there, and the guy who looked after me who speaks Sinhalese only, he kept making all the stupid excuses when I needed to make a phone call. That just made my anger worse! No land line in places in SL, nothing! I really, really do not like miss using my internet privilages, but one thing I will promise you is this. When I know for sure the date that I will leave SL, my anger will vanish. Never, ever ever will I assault a single person. That is one thing I am against. I will never assault anyone. Never will I do that any more. Hitting, is down right uncalled for. When I get angry, I tend to scream, use bad language, and send out emails when I get all fuled. In Canada, that sort of thing will never, ever happen. I know all will go splendid. This is what I try to convince my parents and family. Almost no one in SL speaks English, and this makes me very unhappy. I have no friends here, and that can really make the anger increase. No one understands big English vocabulary here, it’s just a mess! I feel like a waste living here like this in Sri Lanka. I can’t socialize during the day time like I can do in Canada and with the workers and patients when I live in this home there. It will all be joyous! They will make me safe as no injections, and no nasty medication. Here it is too unsafe. Sri Lanka is a threat. All the doctors are interested in doing and what the people are interested in doing to me are fibbinb, injecting, and just making me depressed at bad SL hospitals and miserable. Do you realize that when I was at the two nasty hospitals here, my apetite literally vanished, and I almost had a breakdown! The nurses did not even understand a single bit of English and did not even understand one word I said or the word, breakdown! See my anger and rage is boiling again, but I will control it my dear ones. I was just about ready to call it a day with my life It was almost, almost gonna be over with me!I then changed my mind. That was abuse! I have never known a meaner, violent, unsafe, pathetic, ruggid country like Sri Lanka. No more will I go to a single solitary Sinhalese doctor ever again. That nasty doctor gave me a medication which was so god awful! I won’t describe the side effects, but they were nasty! I just hate being blind friends, I really don’t like being blind at all. People have to be kinder towards blind people. Even Nirosh my cousin lied! My mother lied, and Nirosh lied! Well friends, I am a positive thinker. When I do move back to Canada, it will all be just so, very very exciting and so much joy will happen,I will be crying with happiness. I won’t send out group emails venting in Canada. That is a promise. The problem is I am way too bored in SL and will be isolating myself as I literally get the shivers when I go out somewhere in SL now! After they put me at nasty non professional, disgusting hospitals and no English speakers, that did it. No more outings or trips until I do go back to Canada as I can go anywhere! Yea! All will go so, so so well. Please support me all, you are all wonderful. Anger, is dangerous. Very dangerous. Love you!
Posted on: Tue, 05 Nov 2013 06:36:01 +0000
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