so Christmas is normally a time of joy but it seems like all of the people i want to spread Christmas cheer to r either locked up or in a low place or not willing to b happy and find the positive in the negative things because there is always a positive in every negative i no that first hand i have had to endure a lot of tough times in my few years of life but the thing that always seems to get me through is being able to find the silver lining in every cloud that looks gloomy or i should say is gloomy if i could spread Christmas cheer to any of my friends right now lol i would say merry christmas to elijah hooven, kaylee wilson, colton hite, myranda ost, KC mcgahuey, ricardo ulloa, jonathan cornelius DALE GRAHAM (AND I PUT U IN CAPS BRO BECAUSE U WERE THERE FOR EVERYTHING WITH ME BRO WE WENT FROM HATING EACHOTHER AND TRYING TO BRING EACHOTHER DOWN TO BROTHERS IN THE END BRO AND WEATHER OR NOT I EVER C U AGAIN I WILL FOREVER REMEBER HOW FAR TWO HARD HEADED REDNECKS CAN COME IF THEY REALLY PULL THERE HEADS OUT OF THE BUTS LOL JOSHUA DUNNAGAN U R MY REDNECK NUMBER ONE WE CAN ALWAYS LAUGH AT THINGS NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER COMPREHEND Y THESE THINGS MAKE SENSE TO US BUT THEY DO U HELPED ME C HOPE WHEN NO ONE ELS COULD OR WOULD EVEN TRY I NO IN THE END IT CAME DOWN TO A CHOICE I HAD TO MAKE BUT THAT DAY WHEN I WENT AFTER FREAKY RICKY hahahahaha srry ricardo but i had to because i have to make josh do that ridiculous laugh that we all no and love....... ANYWAY BACK TO U JOSH U AND ME FOUNDED A FRIENDSHIP ON A SOLID FOUNDATION IN A VERY UNSTABLE AREA OF OUR LIVES AND U NO WHAT I MEAN BY THAT ANALOGY BECAUSE U R A REDNECK AND R FAMILIAR WITH MANUAL LABOR I LOVE U BRO I MISS U AND I AM GONNA B STANDING TO THE RIGHT OF THAT ALTAR WHEN U TYE THE KNOT MAN I AM SO HAPPY AND PROUD OF U I WISH I COULD SAY THAT ALL MY STUFF IS GOING GOOD BUT JUST THINKING BOUT THE TALKS WE HAD AND ALL THE PLANS WE R FUNDING AND HOPING FOR IN THE NEAR FUTURE MAY BE ENOUGH TO MAKE ME SEE SOME LIGHT IN THE SELF INDUCED CONFLICT THAT I HAVE PUT UPON MYSELF THIS HOLIDAY SEASON BRO U R STILL GIVING ME HOPE WHEN I NEED IT AND U ARENT EVEN HERE NEXT TO ME ANYMORE BRO I MISS U AND I AM SO HAPPY U R GETTING MARRIED BECAUSE THAT MEANS THAT I WONT HAVE TO TAKE U DOWN WHEN U TRY TO TAKE THE CAT IM CHASING CUZ U WILL B ON A LEASH LOL........ NAH BRO IM JUST KIDDING HAHAHAHA LAUGH SOME MORE LOL SHERRI AND ALAN U TOO I WANT U TO NO THAT EVEN THO U GUYS CAME IN THERE TO SUPPORT JOSH U SUPPORTED ME TO THROUGH THE MOTIVATIONAL COMMENTS AND STUFF U TOLD ME ABOUT MY FUTURE AND EVEN THOUGH THERE WAS NO DENYING I WAS A DOWN RIGHT HELLION AND A COUPLE OTHER INAPPROPRIATE PACKAGES THAT MIGHT GET ME KICK OFF FACEBOOK FOR STATING BECAUSE THEY COULDNT HANDLE MY AWESOME CHOICES OF THE WORDS I MAKE FOR THE LABELS OF THE PACKAGES :) :) MERRY CHRISTMAS TO MY THIRD FAMILY THE DUNNAGANS AND SOON TO BE MISSES JOSHUA LEE DUNNAGAN (CORN),austin burtness, anthony ruiz, russell irby samantha krous and her whole family of god knows how many now lol srry sam but u got a big family hahaha, corey gumm (CREAM GOTTA GET THE MONEY DOLLA DOLLA BILL YALL) i call him gumm-ball, erica my sister of ten nine and a half years, christina hinkelman-greer and her husband paul greer and there three blissfully obnoxious children that i have the privilege to call my extended brothers and sister and yes thats u kaydence fay PAUL CHRISTINA DEE KOTA-BEAR , AND KAYDENCE FAY, U GUYS HAVE BEEN SOLID TO ME AND FOR ME SINCE JULY 12 OF 2011 AND I HAVENT ALWAYS BEEN ON THE BEST OF TERMS WITH U GUYS DUE TO MY DELINQUIENT ORIENTATION AND MY AUTHORITY PROBLEM BUT U GUYS HAVE STAYED THERE FOR ME EVEN WITH ALL THE CHAOS I RAISE AT UR HOUSE TILL THE DAY U STILL LOVE ME LIKE IM ONE OF UR OWN KIN AND THAT MEANS A LOT BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN THROUGH HANDFULS OF FOSTER HOMES THAT CLAIM TO DO THE SAME AND FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT ME AND THEN GIVE UP ON ME WITHIN FORTY EIGHT HOURS OF THE STATEMENT MADE ABOVE BUT U GUYS HAVE DONE IT FOR ME FOR MORE THAN MAYBE U SHOULD HAVE SOME TIMES BUT I GUESS THATS WHAT TRUE FRIENDS ARE FOR U MAKE THEM UR FAMILY U DONT GIVE UP ON THEM AND U DONT PUT UP WITH THERE B.S. AND HELP THEM CORRECT THEMSELVES FOR THE FUTURE U GUYS LOVE ME LIKE MY OWN FAMILY AND FORGIVE ME FOR MY FAULTS IN THE SAME EXACT MANNER OF MY FAMILY THX U FOR LETTING ME TAKE UR COUCH IT HELPS AND IT JUST GOES TO SHOW THAT U GUYS WILL BE THER WHEN I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NOWHERE ELSE TO GO WITHOUT TARNISHING MY RELATIONSHIP AND UR HOUSE I CAN COUNT ON GOOD SANDWICHES FROM PAUL AND WHATEVER IT IS STINA WANTS TO CALL HER COOKING...... U NO IM JUST KIDDING CHRISTINA OK SO DONT TAKE IT PERSONALLY BUT MAYBE U SHOULD ADD SOME MORE SEASONING SO OUR HUH-J DOESNT TASTE LIKE MYSTERY MEAT AND CARDBOARD AND I SPELLED IT LIKE THAT BECAUSE IDK HOW TO REALLY SPELL IT , my friend wes who i dont think has a facebook and his father donald, my greatest wishes to irish the mother of my friend wes this is a very hard time of year for him and donald because she sadly passed last year but they r happy and still chugging forward like the two engines that can thx for being a prime example of finding the courage to move forward with ur lives with such a vital part missing all of a sudden. now my pops always taught me to save the best for last like dessert before the main course hahaha oops dad srry sometimes i cant help myself man u no me and food so merry christmas to my family joshua Helliwell who im so dang proud of little bro i no u will go big at no matter what u do in the future i have faith because out of all of the Helliwell brothers u seemed t5o somehow make it through the tough times we have had to endure as a family i no that nobody here ever worried about u making the stupid choices like i did bro i love u more than u can possibally comprehend and i want u to no and also all of the social network to no that u are everything i wanted to b in everything u r doing right now these activities include football and wrestling ..... JV HELLS YAYA BROHA, levi Helliwell merry christmas bro i love u and i am happy to c that u have finally found a woman tht worships the ground u walk on just as much as u worship the ground she walks on bro i love u and it brings me great pride to say that u r my brother because no matter what ppl say to u or about u behind ur back or to ur face i no that u will never stop loving them u r the most forgiving big hearted guy i have ever had the privilege to know let alone be related to never ever let go of the happiness and lightheartedness that makes u well u bro i love u marry christmas, MMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMAAAAA i think that anyone who can claim to actually no me would tell anyone how much of a mommas boy i am and always have been i want u to no that no matter where i am i still look at the moon when it is out and tell u goodnight because i no u r looking at it also and saying goodnight, and by the way i want u too no that while i was down south doing my time when i got depressed i wished the night would end quicker so they would send us into our cells and i would sit there and look at the moon and carry on a full convo with u with no shame at all haha giggles tears jokes yelling singing prayers and yes even the minor inclusion of some obscenities when the guards would walk by my cell and they would c me talking to the window and calling it mom they told the clinicians i needed to b checked out because it old them i was proud of the fact that im not ashamed to share my love with my mother through a beautiful medium in the nature that u have always taught me to appreciate in ur and pops old fashioned hippy ways lol i looked at the mone whil i was staying at stinas this week nobody saw thogh haha because it was like 2 in the AM... i wanted u to no that i promised u that i would be home for Christmas that i would shape my ship up and get the hell out of the correctional facility and that i would spend it with u well even though im not currently living at our home i will b there tonight when we open presents and i will also b here tomorrow for dinner and if u really truly believed that i would miss it well then thats what u get for thinking haha isnt that what u and dad r always saying haha like im the smart allic er something hahah i love u moms i will keep my word because i have found that there is two things in this world that others and myself can count on me for and that is me being me and me going through whatever it takes to keep my word i may have not grown into the man that will b the cooperate CEO or the next george bush but i will always be ur son and that makes me the richest person in this whole world because i no that u will love me through the hard times that we go through together and against each other merry christmas with love i will always be ur SUGARS mamma, and just to make up for the smart comment at the beginning about the best thing for last and the dessert and all that good noise so i put u last because i no u can appreciate that man in the way we share things we may not get along all the time and sometimes u dont think i love u but i do man u and me are so much alike and i no u c u in me and i think that is y u r so hard on me because u dont want me to b a failure from a mans perspective i nou want me to b a better father and family man than u r because u passed that value down to me because that is what u r striving to b a better father to me and my bros than ur dad was fer u and i want u to no that i look after a lot of ur ways and i no u cant c it now dad but i am a better man that i was two weeks ago and two weeks from now i will still b improving and if there is one thing i learned with my stay in the system its that results take time to measure and i have to take things in increments or baby steps to put it in laymen terms i want u to no that i am striving the best to b the man i no i will eventually become and to b honest i have a long Freaking way to go but i getting ther and when i get there i will still try to b better i am 18 now and to u i think u see that as a let go of all the guidance that i seek from u and junnnnnk but i want u to no that no matter what i c u for ur faults and i also c u for the love and tough love that has helped me be the go get-em type of guy and i think that that personality trait is one of my best and i got it from u i also want u to no that i wouldnt have had half of the doors opened to me with out the easygoing non-shy personality that i inherited from u and that is something i will never let go of because it is a positive trait and it isnt the only one it is just the one at hte forefront of my mind and it has helped me the most as of lately. i love u father of mine and i will always be the son who looks up to u because i no u c u in me and that is y i like the person i am because when u c me dfo good things and u light up i no its because u r proud of the fact that i made a better choice than u expected of me and i exceeded ur expectations i love u man i hope to c those lights u throw off when i make heads turn in awe. my mom and dad have been married for thirty years and some odd weeks now and i thank them for the value that when i tie the knot that there is no untying it because when u make a commitment u follow through with it....... aaaaaaaaaannnnnnd that is y im not getting married till im forty hahaha thought i would crack a joke real quick but seriously the one person in there life that has not only been there for them since they were all close to my age but though the time they got married and now thirty and some odd years later my aunt that i say i dont love but i really do because weather i like it sometimes or not she is my family but i say i dont because she is a smart ass like me and we r both hard headed and we both have a lot of issues that clash when we r trying to solve conflicts but she is still here for me no matter how angry or any of the hurtful things a nd low digs tht i have taken toward her life and where she is and y she has no right to tell me what to do because at time we both act like we r five but i dont think i could lovew her and c her for her and y she cares about me unless i accept the fact that she has traveled the block im traveling and that she know all the outcomes and can help me and i have failed and will probably continue to fail sometimes to see that the feedback she is genuine and comes from the love rooted in her heart for my family merry Christmas thank you for thinking about me when i dont expect u to and thx for being my deviling conscience on my left shoulder when i need it most and thx also for not being afraid to say how u feel about me and my actions as they come because even though it comes accessed hostile i no it comes from ur heart and the love that u have for me and my family i no u want the best for me thx u for all the Christmas munchies u provided for me this year lol i havent eaten that much cookies since i was like well actually it was like a month ago at thx giving but still i always have a sweet tooth and the cookies that u made this year made the December month for me i really do love u and Wendy P.S. no malarkey included, Kayla i no u probably feel like i used u to get through a tough time in my life but i didnt i really do love u and i miss the innocence we had as little kids when u would totally bully me into practicing ballet with u and playing barbies with u because thats the only way i would do any of that girly stuff ;) u have been a major support for me over the past two years and weather things are hard i want u to no that u will always be welcome to call me even though i dont answer ur calls a lot because im scared that i would mess things up again i dont think i want to b in a relationship right now but i will always love u and be grateful for u and ur positive presence in my life when i needed it most we have been family since before we were born idk if in the future things will change for us but i do no that u mean way too much to me and i dont want to let u go i have been very immature lately in the way that i have dealt with the issues that i caused between us and when or if u come up here again i would like to maybe take a walk or a drive and actually talk instead of me just being a dick because i no that the place i put ur heart in my perspective was an unfair position and i no i have hurt u and burnt u a lot but i am asking for ur forgiveness as not only family but as a life long friend and someone who knows way too much about me to let me go,# trumpets i still love that song by the way taht never changed, Noelle blasingame i no the stock u come from and to b straight up thats y i put up with and love ur tomboy not girlie miss i refuse to b a barbie doll for u mom and i wont be caught dead in a two peice bikini which is understandable cuz i dont think i would like to wear a two piece bikini either so i feel u there.... i saw u come home on the third day of the twelve years years of the life ur living and u were the cutest pudgiest little baby and u even hated being as pretty girl back then at least when i was around u werent the girly girly type i remember one specific instance when u were all goo eyed up with some deadly poison that always comes when ur mom produces hot food on the stove and u had the biggest grin on ur face even though she was screaming at u i didnt really think it was that funny the i thought it was annoying lol and i was scared because ur mom was screaming and that would scare anyone that is sane hahahaha now u r still the same fearless in the face of punishment girl that u were then except now as ur older sister would say ur just all sass and u no it and u carry urself in a way thats says u r fearless i have seen u do some pretty righteous things for those u care about and those u love and that fearlessness may have been stupidity in some of those instances and u no they all annoy the crap out of me but i guess thats just who i am i have great hopes for u and i no that ur hopes for urself are much higher than mine r for u and thats great i heard from ur mom that u want to go into the AIR-FORCE, that was my one of my dreams but i wrecked that by getting in trouble for being violent toward a guy who really might not have deserved it because he was just doing the right thing even though it was for the wrong reason it was still the right thing..... wellllll that being said u have really and im mean like dead seriously have got to find another way to flirt with ur crushes because not all guys are like that boy u stabbed because u liked him but i guess he liked it and u two might b able to hit it off when u turn 18 and i say 18 because ur mom wouldnt blink twice before torching his house if she found out u were in a relationship with all do respect of course i mean shes crazy but that crazy just comes from an over abundance of love and protection and guidance for u and ur siblings because she doesnt want u guys to be unsuccessful k keep ur head up thx for the thoughts and the concerns for me being here with u all on Christmas and stuff because i thot u hated me but whatever i hope and wish and really do hold the best in my heart for ur future :) :) :) :) ted lance i am putting ur tribute on fb so that i can still continue with what i was getting at by this whole message but i will read ur tag to u later when we r opening the presents that Santa left for u i cant give u toys or anything but i would if i could because i no how much u love ur toys hahaha... to start off i want u to listen very carefully because u r scaring me with how much u r starting to act like me and are starting to use the same defensive actions and argumentative actions and defiance that i showed when i was little not saying u r little because ur not i no u r a big boy i just feel like u might be a little bit shorter and less developed that the other boys in the house and i guess that will lead right into the real nitty gritty stuff that i want u to get from me because i know u look up to me and u listen to me more idk y i am the meanest of the three of the Helliwell brothers but its alright because like i said theres always positive in every negative and i happen to have possessed a lot of negatives but yes that also means i hold a lot of positives because for every negative there is a positive.....im running off on a tangent man hahahaha... just no that no matter what anybody ever tells u it is ok to b different especially when the wrong thing seems to b the most popular trend on the school yard u r smart and very artistic and u r funny and i know u been hitting on them little girlfriends u have on the bus when u get older u will realize however taht going out with more than one girl can put u in over ur head...... that is mini me if u get caught it will put u in over ur head.... hahaha i was jk that comment was more for the looks that our mothers are giving us for laughing at that statement it totally isnt ok u have to be loyal no matter how hot the girl across the isle is u made a commitment to the one next to u and u need to keep it until there is nothing there bud in life everything comes down to one thing and that thing is a choice. normally there are good choices and there are bad choices if u pick the good choice u have good rewards and if u pick the bad one then u r guaranteed to get a timeout for sometimes a very long time and timeout isnt fun is it i didnt think so bud i love u man i c me in u and i can c where my dad is coming from when he sees him in me but i guess its different cuz u arent my kid but i still want the best and i dont want u to follow the path i did because u have a lot more potential than that i love u bud merry Christmas................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... and that was a four line pause because 40 minutes is how long i have been sitting her spreading this cheer on the Facebook to my friends and family but i want to make sure that if there is any comments it shouldnt b about how whatever gooey blah this is cuz i dont like that if u like this status then i want u to like the post and sit down take 30 to 40 minutes on a staus of ur own to GIVE the love to those u care for and ur friends or family or whomever u fell may need it because it might just make a difference in some lonely childs or sibling or friend or face book associates Christmas festivities i wrote this because i didnt think i would b able to b home and i didnt realize how much i was loved and wanted here and i want them to no that i am not even receiving but i am giving them back my love JUST KIND OF ON THE SIDE BUT NO LESS IMPORTANT THAN THE REST I WANT EVERYONE THAT IS READING THIS THAT IS CURRENTLY STUCK IN THE FOSTER CARE SYSTEM FOR WHATEVER REASON WELL IT DOESNT MATTER U R AWAY FROM UR FAMILY AND I CAN REALTE TO BECAUSE I WAS IN FOSTER CARE OFF AND ON FOR A GOOD PART OF MY TEENAGE YEARS AND I LET IT GET TO ME AND I STARTED TO FEEL ALONE AND HATE THE WORLD AND I CHOSE AND I CANT EMPHASIZE MORE THAT IT IS A CHOICE TO BE WEAK IN THAT SITUATION WITH A FEW EXCEPTIONS OF COURSE SOME PEOPLES SITUATIONS ARE DIFFERENT SO PLZ DONT TAKE THAT THE WRONG WAY BUT I CHOSE TO GO OFF THE DEEP END AND I JUST GOT OF OF JUVENILE PRISON DOWN SOUTH BECAUSE I LET IT BEAT ME DOWN AND I GAVE UP AND I AM NOT SAYING THAT TO BOAST BECAUSE I HATE THAT PART OF ME BUT I WANT THOSE WHO R IN A HOUSE AWAY FROM HOME THAT THERE IS HOPE AND IN THE END THINGS ALWAYS WORK OUT IT MAY NOT B IDEAL BUT IF U LET THINGS JUST KIND OF UNWIND AND U TAKE THE NECESSARY STEPS TO ENSURED THERE IS ENDLESS OPPORTUNITIES FOR THE KIDS AND JUVENILES IN NEED IN THE CARE OF THE STATE ASK UR CASE WORKERS FOR SOME CLOTHING VOUCHERS AND TREAT URSELF AT THE CLOTHING STORE APPLY FOR COLLEGE IF U HAVE BEEN IN THE SYSTEM FOR MORE THAN TWO MONTHS AFTER YOU R SIXTEEN BECAUSE IF THAT IS THE CASE THEN PRETTY MUCH ANY COLLEGE IN THE INLAND NORTHWEST WILL TAKE THE GOVERNMENTS MONEY THAT KEEPS BEATING US DOWN AND PAY FOR THE DEGREE THAT U WANT IF U HAVE COMMUNICATION WITH UR FAMILIES THEN ASK LIKE U R BEGGING FOR A GAS VOUCHER FOR UR FAMILY AND FRIENDS FROM HOME TO HAVE AT LEAST THE NEW YEAR WITH U BECAUSE THEY WONT BE ABLE TO DO IT AS SOON AS CHRISTMAS WHICH SUCKS BUT IF U DIDNT NO THAT AND WERENT ABLE TO UTILIZE IT THIS YEAR THEN IF U R STILL IN THE SYSTEM NEXT CHRISTMAS THENUTILIZE THIS INFO AND MAKE URSELF HAPPY AND IF U HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO WAY OF COMMUNICATING WITH UR FAMILY OF PARENTS BECAUSE OF THE CIRCUMSTANCES THAT WERE PUT IN PLACE BY THE COURT THEN ASK UR CASE WORKERS AND IF U HAVE CINDY FREER SHE IS ALL ABOUT THIS STUFF SO HOUND HER BECAUSE SHE LOVES BRINGING FAMILIES TOGETHER OR IF U HAVE ANOTHER CASE WORKER HOUND THEM UNTIL THEY TEND TO U BECAUSE THATS THERE JOB THEY DID NOT GO TO COLLEGE DEGREE IN SOCIAL SCIENCES TO SIT BEHIND A DESK AND SHOOT THE BREEZE WITH THEIR COLLEAGUES U NEED TO ASK FOR WHAT U WANT AND U HAVE TO DEMAND WHAT U NEED BECAUSE IF U ARENT STRAIGHT FORWARD ABOUT WHAT UR WANTS AND NEEDS ARE THEN IT IS ALSO FALLS ON U BECAUSE U HAVE TONS OF RESOURCES AT UR FINGERTIPS THAT U ARENT GRABBING ON THAT NOTE EVERYONE OUT THERE NOT AT HOME WITH ACCESS TO UR FACEBOOK THAT SUPPORTS THIS STATEMENT ABOVE ABOUT FOSTER CARE AND WANTS TO EMPOWER THE YOUTH IN SYSTEM TO B ABLE TO UTILIZE THE RESOURCES AT THEIR FINGERTIPS SO THAT THEY CAN B HAPPIER AND MIGHT FEEL A LITTLE LESS ALONE DURING THIS HOLIDAY SEASON AND THE ONES TO COME I REPEAT IF U LEAVE ANY SAPPY COMMENTS FOR ME I WILL PROBABLY CUT UR HEAD OFF THROUGH THE INTERNET OK IM NOT SERIOUS BUT STILL DONT B LAZY LIKE IT INSTEAD AND THEN MAKE UR OWN AND SPREAD THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS AND WHAT IT MEANS TO U AND THOSE AROUND U ppppppppeeeeeeeaaaaaaacccccceeeeeee YALLL
Posted on: Wed, 24 Dec 2014 23:38:27 +0000
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